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Unmasking experience

Max

Has anyone else on the spectrum spent most of their time on earth presenting as neurotypical? I spent many of my formative years, including all of my adolescence and now adulthood, trying to appear as ordinary as possible. I don't know if I'm 'high-functioning' or simply a good mimic.

This has included:

- keeping my niche interests and tastes to myself unless I know for certain that others will find them agreeable

- keeping physical tics to a bare minimum

- hiding my true feelings/opinions (this could be related to C-PTSD)

- mirroring the personalities or quirks of other people

I'm a deeply unhappy person with no real sense of self, no real friends and nowhere that I belong. That's what you get for trying to please everyone else!

If anyone has had a similar experience, feel free to share them here.

Thanks.

Parents

  • Hey Max,

    I have recently heard Prof Tony Attwood say, you are better being a first class aspie than a second class neurotypical. The world needs all types of brain. Be proud of who you are.

    I am  NT but I have some colleagues that have ASD they are direct, competent, no BS or politics and helpful -the best people I worked for and with. Be yourself!

    Also a mum to a teen with ASD and he is so down on himself, because like every teenager he wants to fit in. Expect he can’t, because he doesn’t have the social skills and the teenagers can be very mean. 

    So I see how much pain trying to mask causes. 

    When you are yourself as an adult, people will love you for who you are. 

    T.

Reply

  • Hey Max,

    I have recently heard Prof Tony Attwood say, you are better being a first class aspie than a second class neurotypical. The world needs all types of brain. Be proud of who you are.

    I am  NT but I have some colleagues that have ASD they are direct, competent, no BS or politics and helpful -the best people I worked for and with. Be yourself!

    Also a mum to a teen with ASD and he is so down on himself, because like every teenager he wants to fit in. Expect he can’t, because he doesn’t have the social skills and the teenagers can be very mean. 

    So I see how much pain trying to mask causes. 

    When you are yourself as an adult, people will love you for who you are. 

    T.

Children
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