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Work

M

I started a new job in April. It is part time but slightly more hours than my last job, and I also have to work in the office at least 1 day a week, sometimes 2 out of 3 days. I love the job I have gone to and I feel like once I settle in and know what I'm doing that I'll be fulfilled and glad of the change. 

Problem is, right now I feel so anxious. Everything is new about the routine and I'm struggling to adjust from knowing most things in my old job to now knowing virtually nothing in the new one. I hate working in the office because I'm struggling to figure out who I should be and what I should say to get people to like me. I feel really lonely and like there is a spotlight on me as the new person. 

I'm not sure what I hope for with sharing this but I really just wanted to get it off my chest.

Oh and I already take anxiety medication but I feel no real benefit from it. I've tried counselling but I have only ever been able to access 6 sessions at a time because of cost and accessibility through my old work. I'm not sure it'd look great if I asked for it in my new job anyway so early on and I cannot afford private at the moment.

Parents

  • Nothing worse than the first weeks at a new job!

    I'd be tempted to just get on with my job and let people come to you - trying to be liked may mean you try to hook up with the wrong people.     Sit back and measure the environment-  see if you can spot the politics - and who the queen-bee is.

    I wouldn't announce my autism yet until you can gauge how the information will be received - and used.

    Counselling may be particularly useful right now - you'll be lonely so a person you can talk too may help you sort your mind.

    Good luck.

  • in reply to Plastic

    Well, I did tell occupational health when I started that I am autistic and they did write a brief report to my manager for her information, but as of yet she hasn't spoken to me directly about it. I do feel I'd benefit from a conversation with her about it because she is VERY kind and supportive (or so it seems), and in a way I'd like to reassure her that I'm NOT a burden, but at the same time the way I'm feeling does seem like a burden. I'm a very open and reflective person ordinarily so perhaps not sharing this is why I'm feeling so meh. I definitely feel lonely. I even thought about ringing samaritans just to say aloud to someone how I feel, but I hate phone calls so I just internalise everything instead! 

    If you read above, the working environment due to covid isn't making it easy to just sit back and watch...

  • in reply to M

    That's an awkward working environment - but that's really to your advantage - it's so much more under control without too much overload.

    I know what you mean about not wanting to seem needy - it's a fine balance between helping you to fit in and making you into the 'special' person to be resented.

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  • in reply to M

    That's an awkward working environment - but that's really to your advantage - it's so much more under control without too much overload.

    I know what you mean about not wanting to seem needy - it's a fine balance between helping you to fit in and making you into the 'special' person to be resented.

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