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Masking and Unmasking

TheLoneWolf

I find this video really interesting......what do you all think of this?

I want to hear from everyone....but female peeps, especially please chime in. I rarely bring up gender. I feel equal...I demand respect-I don't need to talk about it or try for it.

However, I think there is a universal reaction that when a man is direct--he's respected/taken well......when a woman is direct--she's a ***/intimidating/not taken well.

I feel like I've ignored this fact in my past...and have thought in the past that people should be evolved enough to not take it that way---and yet I tend to get specific reactions....mostly negative, some positive/respectful. Sometimes starts as negative and warms up to positive over time.

Thoughts?


Parents

  • I don't (as yet) accept that masking a trait specific to autism. I'm not going to watch this video for this reason. Not yet, at any rate.  I don't think I've ever met anyone with or without autism who doesn't mask their natural personality to conform to social pressures, and/or avoid abuse or social conflict. 

    I know it's a popular concept in autistic circles, which is why I avoid it. I wouldn't want anyone to think I was in any way diminishing their very real experiences. But, for me, I have seen no evidence in the articles I've read to suggest that it is in anyway unique to autistic people. That may be a result of how it is being described.

    What I can accept is that i    t may be more pronounced or exaggerated in autistic people. Autistic people do seek to hide the fact that they are autistic. This is true for many minorities in society who have sought to conceal certain physical traits in order to blend in and be accepted by the cultural majority. 

    So, perhaps I'd feel more receptive to the idea of autistic masking, or some other term that distinguishes the physical and psychological accommodations autistic people make from the ones that everyone else makes.

    No human I've ever encountered, autistic or otherwise, has been entirely authentic in the company of other humans. Even heterosexual males who are considered as having more social privilege are constantly engaged social posturing with one another (usually psychological or physical plays for dominance). We all inherit and perform social roles. We all wear different masks for different situations and for different interactions: Father, Mother, Brother, Friend, Lover, Employee, Employer, Teacher, Student... the list is endless. My understanding is that it's the very foundation of all human interaction. 

    In fact, wearing physical masks to change our appearance has been deeply engrained in every expression of human culture since the first humans danced around fires in caves wearing painted face-coverings. 

    So, while it is possible that masking is more pronounced among autistic people for reasons of acceptance and conflict-avoidance, I don't believe it is unique to us.  All humans conform, to some degree, to the norms of the tribe and culture we are part of, whether we do it consciously or unconsciously. 


  • in reply to ☕Tassimo ☕

    I am OBSESSED with uncovering mental models (society, upbringing, self-image) etc. Absolutely fascinated with this and going through the ups/downs of discovering what mine are.

Reply Children
  • in reply to ☕Tassimo ☕

    I love experiments & learning other points of view....this is interesting. I've def always had a problem with authority/obedience & I see alot of group think in the world today-that I believe is really sad. You might find this video interesting...I watched it the other day, how most of the 60's flower children.....ended up conforming and losing sight of their own personal values/ideals.....like a force they couldn't/didn't realize was happening. I think they conformed bc they were lured into 'materialism'. Big house, nice car, luxury of the 80's.

  • in reply to TheLoneWolf

    It is a fascinating area of study. It's just that there are very few empirical studies conducted. A lot of the stuff that passes for research is mostly subjective opinion and/or anecdotal.

    One of the best observable studies that revealed how we adapt and conform to social and institutional pressures was conducted in the 60's. It's a very famous experiment, so you may already be familiar with it. 

    1967-classroom-experiment-proved-how-easy-it-was-for-americans-to-become-***-

    Also, there are the groundbreaking experiments of Milligram (also in the 60's). The goal of the Milgram experiment was to test the extent of humans' willingness to obey orders from an authority figure. It seems that most humans are easily able to turn against each (and commit acts of violence on other people) in order to conform to authority.

    milgram-experiment

    Both fascinating, but quite chilling examples of the herd-like mentality of humans and their willingness to follow leaders. It's an uncomfortable reality. But, you can see it play out even in today's pandemic between the pro and and anti-maskers.