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# Daily Updates 2 #

aidie

this is the next chapter of 

https://community.autism.org.uk/f/miscellaneous-and-chat/20213/daily-updates

just a space for people can say what they have been doing today so we can keep up and in touch

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  • I'm trying to prepare for a two hour conversation tomorrow with one of my managers where I need to somehow convince him of a number of problems, including the fact that the management team employs gaslighting behaviours without even realising it. Supposedly, concerns are supposed to be reported and investigated. But I've already had one chat and without even looking at any of the evidence, he was already making excuses on their behalf and telling me that I'm creating problems where there are none - Which is Gaslighting.

    I don't have high hopes for this meeting tomorrow Disappointed

  • in reply to Loz

    Best of luck. Keeping my fingers crossed that they listen and it goes well.

    My experience of conversations like this is that I think I've made a breakthrough and all of a sudden something will happen where it's back to square one. Folk can be over-diplomatic even when the concerns are real or can adopt a defensive posture when a better approach could be taking time to see things from someone else's' point of view. It's quite a step for some managers/leaders to admit "actually we didn't get that right".

    It's an on-going thing though.... I'm still navigating which things I need to call out and which things I can probably let slide.  

  • in reply to Ethan

    It ended up going well. About 2 and a half hours and still more to figure out. Fortunately this particular manager has a better understanding of how I'm struggling and recognises the need for ongoing discussion. I wish he was still one of my direct managers but he got a promotion so I can't deny him that. I'm on leave next week and we'll have another chat when I get back. It's like finally breaking through. There is always a fear that it will go backwards as you say. I've had those experiences before. But it's gotten to the stage where I can't ignore it any longer and still be able to function. Gotta sort it out.

  • in reply to Loz

    Great news - glad it went well. Similar experience for me (my manager who "got" me left on promotion so I'm having to start over with the current bunch who are pretty hard work).

    Hope things continue to go well for you.

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