Can anyone recommend support options please? (BPD/EUPD)

I posted on my intro and Adie kindly sent me some info, but what I really need to know is whether there's anyone in this community who meets the diagnostic criteria for both Aspergers and borderline personality disorder.  

I have books, I have journals ( my work is research).  But what I cannot find is anyone who can work with an autism focus to my personality disorder.  I love the kindness that my autism (no longer allowed to call this aspergers apparently) can offer me; I am not an angry person by nature but I do have angry outbursts when I feel unheard or if people treat me or others unfairly. 

Meditation drives me mad, work is my obsession.  But I need to find something in between.  I love running and this morning was out in the park to see the sunrise, it was amazing and I cried because as beautiful as it was I felt so alone.  I am addicted to this feeling and equally aware that this is perhaps not healthy.

Apologies as I am also not familiar with how to write Asperger's so testing out options.  Having been defined by acronyms I also hate BPD as it is reductive.

Thank you.

Wrennie. 

Parents
  • I've had a tentative diagnosis of EUPD. I'm not sure it totally fit me though. I tend to feel I'm possibly ADHD-y or possibly something like bipolar II. There's quite a bit of overlap between each of these. EUPD, ADHD and bipolar all seem to have the elements of emotion dysregulation as a key feature.

    I seem to have some Aspie-ish traits but I'm waiting (and waiting :) ) to get a diagnosis to help work out which ones of these many conditions I may or may not have.

    Some of the things write about strike a chord with me. Researching things is a passion for me. I used to research health matters, now unemployed, I research history (but also psychological things too).

    There's quite a freedom in the sight of sunrises and sunsets. I really like to be out to watch the sun either rising or falling and the sky going orange and pink. It's nice to be out with someone else to watch a sunrise or sunset together with Slight smile

    As for support ... I don't totally know. Things that have made things a touch easier for me have been understanding. Understanding myself and understanding others. Which is a life's work and ongoing. Connecting with others who understand or even just kind of understand is a bit of support in itself I find. (?)

  • Thank you for the response, good to hear that some of my comments resonated. I agree that understanding takes a long time; I am still working on this but have found my compassion through having a new explanation.  I also went through multiple diagnoses many years ago, but again I agree that the emotion dysregulation underlies many of these.  You have inspired me to get out in the car early tomorrow and find somewhere to watch the sunrise with my partner - all I have to do is get him out of bed early enough!

Reply
  • Thank you for the response, good to hear that some of my comments resonated. I agree that understanding takes a long time; I am still working on this but have found my compassion through having a new explanation.  I also went through multiple diagnoses many years ago, but again I agree that the emotion dysregulation underlies many of these.  You have inspired me to get out in the car early tomorrow and find somewhere to watch the sunrise with my partner - all I have to do is get him out of bed early enough!

Children
  • "My plan is to understand more about the Aspie parts of me"

    Yeah, I see. And, yes, it's good having this forum available Slight smile

  • Yes I do agree.  I have lots of BPD friends and colleagues, but don't always feel able to contact them as they have lots going on too.  My plan is to understand more about the Aspie parts of me, I've already found some great reading which has cleared up a few things about my life experiences.  In the end, it has to come from me (just a tad exhausting sometimes).  Great to have this forum!

  • I've found that most of the work seems to need to be done by the person with the condition. I've found someone in my area with a BPD diagnosis and we were talking about it last night. How there's quite a lack of useful therapy.

    It seems like those of us with a BPD diagnosis can probably learn quite a lot from talking with each other. I know quite a lot of us are quite intuitive people, so we can hear what helps others and work out what might help ourselves to an extent.

  • Sorry - rational thinking, not rationale!

  • Thank you, I did get out, albeit a bit later, and it was lovely.  Also had a run this morning at 5.45am and hope to do the same tomorrow.  Thank you also for the offer to chat more - I have since heard back from the people who did my autism assessment and have a call booked for Saturday.  Shall see what they have by way of suggestions.  I think I am still angry about how MH services have treated me and need to find a way to get over this and move on!  Considering I went through MBT and found it so hard to do the mentalising aspect, the rationale thinking process has not improved much; other than I am more determined to find like-minded people.

  • I hope you got to get out and watch a sunrise with your partner. Or get to do that soon at least Slight smile

    I've noticed that the people I know (either in person or online) with EUPD tend to have gone through a whole journey to get their diagnosis.

    If you'd like to talk about some of difficulties or situations that autism and EUPD presents for you, I'd be happy to read and have a think about whether I get similar, or how closely I can relate.

    I think falling into black and white thinking can be difficult if it comes to emotional situations. To judge a situation calmly/rationally, when things look very bleak or against oneself, can feel very difficult or even seem impossible to deal with in the moment, at times.