Published on 12, July, 2020
sayings like , "autism is a superpower" or "autism isn't a disability, it is a different ability" worry me sometimesI feel like this invalidates people who aren't quite comfortable with being Autistic or Autistic people who feel as though their ASD has more negative than positive impacts or those who feel as though their diagnosis has an equal amount of positive and negative effects. I understand these sayings have positive intentions and are meant to empower Autistic people, but it just kinda comes off as inspirational stuff to me. Again this is good.
But two thirds of autistic people are in the mid and severe ends of the spectrum and so will probably never/rarely be in this forum or have their voice/opinions heard.
I am lucky to be the way I am. But there are days I wish I could swallow a pill and my autism would be gone.
I am equal amounts of positive and negative with shrinking negatives.
But I always think about those who are really suffering on the spectrum.
Do you feel Autism is a real downer for you ? how bad is it ? and most importantly ,,,,,,,,,What can be done to help or change things for you?
Totally agree with you TheLoneWolf
SO KIND. Thank you, I'm going to scrnshot/save this comment. I think it's so important that we relate to each other and gain understanding, give empathy/compassion--just giving that person the recognition that you "recognize" they're having a hard time & it's ok---goes a long way. Wherever the are on the spectrum. What we don't need, is comparison of who's got more neuroses/disabilities etc....we're all having our struggles and go up/down like a rollercoaster. We all just want understanding and compassion and for someone to go "Those people/that situation were likely wrong, you are incredibly intelligent/talented/caring....so get past it to the next...YOU CAN DO IT! F*#k IQ and work on EQ. NAS71674
Yes and you can get that support anytime no problem. I read your post above and its inspirational to me (especially with having similar but different difficulties myself) that you can cope with that and over come it even though it is so difficult and also that you are a straight talker about it which is refreshing. I'm glad your husband is atypical and can support you directly. I have an autistic girlfriend myself and there is no substitute!
I consider myself autistic first before anything else and I feel that goes deeper and is more intrinsic to who and what i am as a person, than anything else such as nationality or religious denomination etc. So I am delighted that someone else feels the same way about it. If there was significantly more of us who did we might be able to actually make it happen, maybe.
And I take it back---you guys are a support system--I'm so grateful for that.
I like the way you write. Some really good stuff. I think the reason this is a dichotomous conversation-is, it is both a disability, & a superpower. For some, more than others-differs on a different day, different time of the day. For me it's both. Being autistic means for me....a constant paradox. If you met me as an asd/adhd/high anxiety....you'd see successes and masking & assume I don't struggle-but that's absolutely not true. I have days, just like yesterday-where I have to sit in a bed and stim bc of panic attacks/high anxiety. I put on music, the music's too much. I try to play video games-then sensory issues & dyspraxia makes using my hands and coordination difficult. I should eat/but nothing sounds appealing. Nobody sees my disability-but some days it's crippling. The truth is, I think some people get really angry that they feel disabled, that they have difficulties......people are calling autism a "superpower," they must not know the same struggles I have....but we all feel this way--maybe I'm wrong. There isn't support for people like me on the spectrum, if I wasn't married to an adhd man--I think I'd be really lost. Having a partner that supports me/understands that isn't a neurotypical---has changed my life & helps me to keep going when the eventual roller coaster of attention/motivation/IG issues/pressure or perceived pressure, etc. is going full throttle. Everyone has something they're good at, something incredible and I've seen it even more so with autists. If all we do is focus on our disability-there should be compassion/empathy--we're bound to let it affect our self esteem--I know I did until I learned everyone else is dealing with the same crap. We're autists and many of us, not only dealing with that as a disability, but other learning difficulties/disorders AND mental health issues. I say learn as much about yourself and your strengths/weaknesses and do what you can to help the mental health issues (I am pro-medication, even if short-term). A personal SWOT analysis. I hate the fake overly positive stuff--but if I don't think positively about it--(which I don't everday) then what am I left with? Yeah, I have real disabilities, but that's not going to stop me striving for greatness, even more so bc the road is incredibly difficult. I try to remember that....when I've done something great, but all I see is a mistake/incomplete etc.
I am Di, Di has disabilities & mental health struggles....but out of those differences, I give it my all to overcome so that I can see Di's abilities.
NAS71674 said:I would be in favour of recognising autistic people as a separate group (just like travellers got recognised and they are much closer to NT people than we are) with laws to protect us allowing us to live our lifes how best suits us
What a fantastic idea! Yes, yes, yes, I am in favour of this too!
From one autistic person to another, your welcome.
This is the video, I went & watched it! I've shown at least 5 people. This youtube does an amazing blind observational study (I believe) about the differences in rapport between neurotypicals & autists. GREAT VIDEO POST. I had to hunt to find your post to tell you-thankyou!
I'm sorry you had to go through that.
I went to private christian school where we got the video on girls & the boys got to watch both the girls/boys videos. WTF.
There is a legal definition
You're disabled under the Equality Act 2010 if you have a physical or mental impairment that has a 'substantial' and 'long-term' negative effect on your ability to do normal daily activities.
I don't put that much confidence in the law or legal definitions, its allowed racists to abuse me for a number of years without any consequences for them for example so its not even good never mind perfect. I think this definition is incomplete, it should include a clause that indicates this state must be invariant of the environment you find yourself in. A person who cannot walk will not be able to walk regardless of how they live, that's a disability. A person with ADHD will never be able to concentrate on something without medication, thats a disability. Autistic people if they are allowed to live in a way that helps them then these negative effects disappear (I am excluding autistic people who have a comorbidity of learning difficulties for example). So I don't think its a true disability, the negative effects are caused by being forced to live a lifestyle that is not designed for us just like a native amazonian would struggle to cope with life in London for example as its not designed for them. I would be in favour of recognising autistic people as a separate group (just like travellers got recognised and they are much closer to NT people than we are) with laws to protect us allowing us to live our lifes how best suits us (maybe even identifying it as a culture we have. A definition of culture: the ideas, customs, and social behaviour of a particular people or society.) to reduce the negative impacts we experience being forced to live how NT do and that takes advantage of our strengths for the good of our communities that we live in.
While I generally agree that asserting that neurotypical society is the correct measuring stick against which to measure autism is highly questionable I must take issue with this one thing you say. that something is a disability or it isn't. Language is messy, words, including disability, often have multiple definitions, often with considerable overlap, but which are not interchangeable. It's entirely possible for something to be and not be a disability depending on the definition you use.
fair enough. We only gain from having and expressing different views
Most of the people on this long thread who judge it as a disability are doing so by comparing their autistic traits to the benchmark set by NT people or based on the negative experiences they have due to the comorbidities of autism not autism itself. Its not a personal opinion, its either a disability or its not. It can't be both at the same time. I put a link on this thread that showed a presentation given by clinicians that showed that when outside observers watched two autistic people (without knowing their diagnosis) they could not tell they were autistic and could only see autism presenting when you had an autistic person interacting with an NT person (funny enough). If thats not strong evidence that its not a disability, just a difference in the type of human being we are, I don't know what is. People are entitled to their own opinions but not their own facts. I am about the business of facts and clarity.
thanks! what a nice thing to say thanks Rojah
tv reply it worked
Thank you Aidie for bringing people together, presenting a topic we can continue giving awareness to and learn from by the perspectives of many people
Hi Michael, thank you for sharing this. I am always learning to use the correct terminology within the community and will find this invaluable. I agree that having mental ill-health there are moments you can feel alright and not so great the next so the mind can definitely differ from time to time. I have to be thankful I have a caring family and friends for support and to talk to when times get tough.
I return to him every month say, and listen to his lectures each time and I pick up his meaning better and better. Yes his voice is amazing. Alan was one of the people who got me into Zen.
He doesn't really explain meditation too much as he was wee bit against it. He was more "the golden age" of Zen.
I haven't read his books but all his lectures are in Youtube. I sometimes put one on and go to sleep listening to him.
he was a great guy.
charlotte joko Beck writes good readable / explaining books on mindfulness and zen meditation. she has audios on youtube.
she has got through to my autistic mind so she must be good !
wishing you well