Making a diagnosis. burnout

Hello. I will have to undergo a diagnosis soon, my psychiatrist says that when I make a diagnosis, I will be able to get the necessary support. I have no doubt about the diagnosis, since it was made in childhood, but then I was forced to leave my country and leave all the medical documents there, I can not return for them. When diagnosing in adulthood, you need those who saw me as a child, but this is not possible, since the connection with relatives is lost.

Will the lack of medical documents from my childhood and the absence of those who knew me in the past be an obstacle to a diagnosis?

I only have a history of observation in a psychiatric clinic for the last 5 years and a spouse with whom we have been together for 8 years and who has seen both my meltdowns and overload and communication problems.

The diagnosis is necessary, because I have a prolonged burnout caused by a completely destroyed life and associated difficulties, and when I do not cope, I break down and start beating myself and beating my head or stop talking or start screaming, as if I were a child again. Sometimes I want to die and then I get to the hospital where I get wrong diagnoses, for example, emotionally unstable personality disorder or hysterical disorder. Once, when I did not talk for half a year, they wrote to me that I had a regression in development and spoke to me as a person who was not in reality or simply ignored me, although I understood everything. I was also tied up in a closed room, although I just needed silence, darkness, and a heavy blanket. They prescribed unnecessary medications that ruined my health and I became very fat. The new doctor was able to connect 2+2 and now I can pass the diagnosis. In any case, I think that this will help me. I'm also afraid that past incorrect entries will interfere with the diagnosis.

 I used to cope with life better, I had plans, I could work, I studied at the university, I sang in the choir, I painted, I wrote poetry, but then everything collapsed due to external events and I broke down. 7 years of lost life without the ability to restore it.

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  • Hi there, Roritet:

    Thank you for your post and I’m sure I’m not the only one whose heart goes out to you. It sounds like you’ve been through a great deal of difficulty. 

    To answer the question you posed, yes, my understanding is that an Autism diagnosis can be made regardless of whether one is able to provide the assessing clinician with childhood documents or third-party evidence. It depends on the clinician and that is something that I would suggest you talk about with him or her prior to beginning the assessment process. You have the right to choose who evaluates you, and you can always consult with other clinicians, in the event the first or even second propose clinician insists on having childhood information or documents you simply cannot provide.

    Please remember if possible that what matters is getting an accurate diagnosis, not rushing to get a diagnosis. If you are able to be patient, I believe you will get the correct diagnosis from a quality clinician.

    If you need help advocating for yourself regarding the issue in the preceding paragraph, I recommend you contact someone from the charity that hosts this website. I anticipate they can probably provide you with an advocate, or help you to connect with one. That advocate can then potentially attend appointments with you as you select your evaluating clinician.

    Regarding the seven years from your life you have lost, including to what appeared to have been highly traumatic life events, misdiagnoses, and traumatic medical treatments, you are not alone.  Although I have noticed that people do not seem to discuss that on this website, I have read enough about people with Autism, and I refer to myself here as well, to be able to share with you that it is common for adults who are finally diagnosed to have lost10, 15, or more years of their lives to highly traumatic and difficult circumstances.

    These circumstances can include professional failures and disasters, relationship instability and chaos, domestic violence, breakdown of family relationships, self-harm, suicide attempts, self-soothing through alcohol and drug and food abuse, and, very commonly, extreme financial difficulty. Not everyone is able to live full-time with family members or supportive partners and receive emotional, logistical, and financial support from them, day to day.  Such individuals are of course very fortunate.

    I hope you know that many of us are here for you on this site and that you are always welcome to come here and chat with us. I hope you will go forward in pursuing your diagnosis, seeking support from a clinician you trust. I want to share with you that I obtained my diagnosis without being able to provide any childhood documentation or third-party information, and I trust that will be the case with you also. Again, please consider reaching out to the organization that hosts this website in order to seek help from an advocate to help you select your clinician. 

    Finally, regarding your meltdowns and the banging of your head, you are not alone in that either. Although that’s not something frequently discussed on the site, I would venture a guess that 60% to 70% of the people on this site have done the same thing, even if it was only a few times in their lives. I recall doing it three times in moments of extreme anguish. It was spontaneous and it just suddenly happened.

    Sometimes the stress and overload that we face, particularly if we are undiagnosed and our significant others/family members are not being supportive or understanding, just become utterly overwhelming. Self-harm is not uncommon when one is dealing with such difficulty.

    Please be gentle with yourself. You are important and you matter. It was clear to me as I read your post what a thoughtful and strong person you are. The world is very fortunate to have you.

    I am sending you lots of support and again, we are here for you on this site. 

    Elizabeth

  • thank you for your comments. it was important for me to hear this.

  • You’re so welcome, Roritet! We’ve got your back and you have a community and support on here with us! Blush

    Elizabeth

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