People relativising AS and telling you that you seem 'normal' to them ?.

Yes (had a similar experience) and no, you're not (being too analytical), because I'd think your new support worker would have been better prepped before being unleashed on their clientele and making such clumsy, fumbling comments (apologies for the language, I'm in a jovial mood and this sort of thing gets me very cross! )

I've recently been diagnosed and my psychologists assessment went to my senior managers. Apparently one of the discussions was that I needed to do "X" job (which I'm really not suited for) because "to be fair to everyone else I couldn't be treated any differently," 

Let that sink in for a minute. After I've been off sick for 6 months. Receiving counselling (which I had to pay for to get a decent one) and referred to a psychologist with my employers full awareness.

In many other areas of work I function really well - indistinguishable from my peers and my guess is that is what they were basing their judgement on.

I've even had a similar comments when a colleague and myself had a piece of work we'd been working on together commandeered (or at least it seemed that way to others) and we both agreed we were angry and frustrated. When we swapped notes and unpicked that, under that surface commonality, the way we processed that experience is very different. For her it was someone "taking something away", for me it was a decision poorly communicated with no rationale and no-one could explain to me why it had been made that way or why this other person was needed which left me confused. That built a lot of understanding, our working relationship has deepened a bit now she understands me a bit more.

That's how I handle the comments from NT's. On the surface the experience seems the same. Underneath the processing is very different.

You're right to be proud of your achievements - because you've been finding you way in a world that isn't really designed for your in mind. I've realised I've made the mistake of judging myself by the same standards of NT's - and that no, it wasn't just a case of trying harder, because if it was - I wouldn't still be struggling with the same stuff. The more I've really thought about how people just function in general, and how much I didn't "get", I've realised how disadvantaged we can be.

Sounds like your support worker needs some education. Honestly, you shouldn't have to do it. I feel the same way when dealing with my senior managers.

If there's a way you can feedback your experience to someone senior - they should have a conversation with that support worker. It's feedback - part of learning a new role.

Or you can mention it to your support worker the next time you see them --- "the last time we spoke you said.... and I felt....." and then mention how common experiences can be processed differently by NT's and ASD's. The "newbie" support worker might not "get it" straight away but it'll be something for them to think about. 

Best wishes

"to be fair to everyone else I couldn't be treated any differently," 

I had major foot surgery and whilst I was back at work, I was still recovering. I somehow got a load of shifts that involved me having to race out to the bus, across a busy road with no crossing within a four minute space of time. I therefore asked if I could do a shift that was only different by half an hour, but gave my 34 minutes instead.

He didn't use the same phrase, but it felt like it was based on the same type of absurdity. His was 'the needs of the business'. One of my colleagues pointed to the boot on my leg and my crutches and reminded him that I was the only person on the office floor who had a valid reason to ask. In the end, he still said no and one of my other colleagues offered to swap shifts, thus working around management. 

I know I'm generalising here, and there is always excellent exceptions. But managers are dumb.

I've had very few managers I've been directly frustrated at, although my patience was being pushed on that occasion. Still, I have collected numerous absurdities of decision-making (or lack of) over the years.

Although in my gaffe it seems to be that if you're able to convince someone else of the things you did, it doesn't matter how well you did them - they'll give you some points just for sounding convincing and consider you management material without checking whether a) the thing that was claimed to have happened, actually happened and b) if it did happen whether it worked, or just flushed everything down a blocked dunny for an incoming team member to clean up.   

I saw a recent study that concluded 60% of middle managers were actually damaging their employer's profitability with their incompetence and petty rules and with them promoting their useless favourites over better staff and demoralising their teams..    

I saw a recent study that concluded 60% of middle managers were actually damaging their employer's profitability with their incompetence and petty rules and with them promoting their useless favourites over better staff and demoralising their teams..