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Dating someone on the spectrum when I’m not?

NAS71027

Hello,

Recently I met a guy who I think is on the spectrum, his friend mentioned it but the topic was changed and I don’t want to ask him outright, but I think he is. Is it okay for someone who isn’t on the spectrum to date someone who is? How will the relationship be different to dating someone who isn’t on the spectrum and is there anything I should keep in mind? He asked me out to dinner and he’s so sweet, my friends think “he’s weird” and are telling me to back away but he is gorgeous and we’ve been talking for a few days, I’m really enjoying it. I guess I’d like to hear from someone on the spectrum and what their opinion is? I don’t want it to seem that I’m taking advantage of him. 

I really appreciate any replies so thank you so much in advance :) 

Parents

  • Of course it is OK! ASD or not, we're still the same species. (I am female aged 20 with suspected ASD and I have dated ASD and non-ASD guys.)

    You might need to be a bit more patient with him because sometimes it is overwhelming if things move too fast. He might suddenly cut off communication for a few days if he needs to 'come up for air' but that doesn't necessarily mean it's going badly or anything. It's just because new relationships take a lot of concentration. 

    And bear in mind that miscommunication can happen very easily. But it will be fine if you communicate clearly, ie don't assume he has picked up subtle hints. Ask directly rather than reading into it if he's acting unusual and you think something's wrong.

    Good luck, msg me if you want to ask anything :) 

Reply

  • Of course it is OK! ASD or not, we're still the same species. (I am female aged 20 with suspected ASD and I have dated ASD and non-ASD guys.)

    You might need to be a bit more patient with him because sometimes it is overwhelming if things move too fast. He might suddenly cut off communication for a few days if he needs to 'come up for air' but that doesn't necessarily mean it's going badly or anything. It's just because new relationships take a lot of concentration. 

    And bear in mind that miscommunication can happen very easily. But it will be fine if you communicate clearly, ie don't assume he has picked up subtle hints. Ask directly rather than reading into it if he's acting unusual and you think something's wrong.

    Good luck, msg me if you want to ask anything :) 

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