My mother advised me it's best to avoid eye contact with people completely in public.
What are your thoughts on that?
I felt it was rude to do that but tried it while we were out in supermarkets shopping earlier on, and although it felt odd and somewhat ignorant, and also I missed seeing who was near me - in case I recognised someone or there was someone interesting to look at - I think I felt more calm and less overloaded in the way that can lead up to an Autistic meltdown.
Hi, Roswell:
Thanks so much for your post. I think I understand why your mum might’ve given you that advice. I thought I would share, however, that when I am in public I keep a pleasant smile on my face and look briefly and politely at people, for the reasons you mentioned in your post. I do this even when I am wearing my COVID-19 mask because I find people can see I’m smiling, in my eyes.
I actually find that at least half of all people give me a smile back. I also find that elderly people and mothers with young children, and the children themselves, seem to appreciate the smile and we can even strike up little conversations about the innocuous or funny things happening around us. I’ve had some pretty amazing little interactions with people in these circumstances, usually in stores, and I don’t live in a small, stereotypically “friendlier” sort of a town.
I think because it’s so rare for people to smile or be willing to engage with others in public, when it happens not only the people directly involved but those around them seem to be lifted by it and appreciative, including me.
The one exception is that I don’t do this with men because I don’t want to send them the wrong signals and/or cause them to feel uncomfortable.
Thanks for reading this and thanks again for your original post. I hope you’re having a great day,
Elizabeth
You’re so welcome! I should add that I don’t necessarily find it easy to do what I described doing. It’s just something that I’ve learned and it’s really blessed me with some lovely interactions with people.
Elizabeth
