Been In Two Abusive Relationships, Do I Deserve To Be Happy With Someone?

I’ve been in two long term relationships (one in my mid teens, the other in my late teens) with two different guys. I have also had a couple other people I’ve had dates with and gave dating a go but didn’t happen after a few months. I’m still on speaking terms with my recent ex but that’s mainly out of fear. The truth is, I’ve become close with someone new. He’s perfect for me. We have more in common with each other (both of us are autistic), his family are a lot nicer and more supportive and we’ve supported each other during the lockdown by calling and texting everyday. My ex doesn’t know about the new guy since he remarked that one of his work colleagues was a bit of a s**t for going out with someone new just after she had broken up with someone else. He also likes to make remarks that are quite erotic and jokes about my intimate body parts a lot even though I’ve told him to stop.

I don’t want to reveal publicly things that have happened to me but they’ve been really traumatic in my past and still affect me now. Therapy for mental health issues hasn’t helped and there’s no one I can really turn to about it. Do I deserve to date someone or shall I let the new person down and never date again?