• Replies 10 replies
  • Subscribers 84 subscribers
  • Views 1841 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Making friends?

Myrmeleon

This is an issue that I believe pertains to my Asperger's syndrome, which is that I feel I have a very hard time making friends or keeping up relationships with anyone I do make friends with. I'm 24 years old and I get very lonely (not in the sense of wanting a partner, for clarification) because of how few friends I actually have.

For context, I was never good at making friends as a child. I really struggled with social interactions with most people when I was young, especially with the other children I was at school with. This only worsened when I went to secondary school (because, for whatever reason, as soon as children walk through the gates of a secondary school they turn into such utterly vile monsters), as I was bullied, both emotionally and physically, to an extreme extent for practically the entirety of my secondary school career, and even for the duration of my sixth form college years too. As a result of all this, I feel a great anger and apprehension towards people my own age, or people in younger age groups as a result of this. 

The aforementioned issue, coupled with my intense focus on interests many others I know have branded as "niche", has led me to have very few friends. (For clarification, my main interests are biology, particularly animal sciences such as entomology, and also the visual arts; I enjoy drawing pictures and also like graphic novels and cartoons.)

I'm at an absolute loss, and have been ever since this sudden realisation about how I have very few people other than my immediate family present in my life. I hate feeling so alone. I want to have friends who share my interests which, again, most people think are "weird". I realise there's more to friendship than this, but I honestly have had moments in the past where I would be upset at the fact that I would, for example, read a paper or article about a species of beetle I like, and then have no one to share this passion with. 

What I want to ask the other people of this forum of, is if you have any advice for making friends? Or, how to cope with this kind of loneliness? 

Thanks for reading. 

Parents

  • Literally, I know how you feel. I don't have Aspersers myself - just plain ASD, but like I'm at college studying performing arts and  I find it so overwhelming because I struggle to make friends also. They're not necessarily bullying me, but like I guess they struggle to relate to me or something? Or I struggle to relate to them? Idk, but whatever it is it's like I'm in the minority of people who can't seem to find like-minded people and that has truly put me into some deep loneliness. I mean like I have a few friends in my life here and there and they're nice and friendly, but sometimes they are so unresponsive because they are at like different ends of the spectrum, I guess. 

    What you were saying about the interests, like, no they're not weird whatsoever. Things like that are quite interesting tbh, I don't share an interest in that kinda stuff, but there are definitely people who would. Once this pandemic is not as bad, then why don't you join some kinda club where you can meet people with those interests? Plus, you may actually find like-minded people there or something.

Reply

  • Literally, I know how you feel. I don't have Aspersers myself - just plain ASD, but like I'm at college studying performing arts and  I find it so overwhelming because I struggle to make friends also. They're not necessarily bullying me, but like I guess they struggle to relate to me or something? Or I struggle to relate to them? Idk, but whatever it is it's like I'm in the minority of people who can't seem to find like-minded people and that has truly put me into some deep loneliness. I mean like I have a few friends in my life here and there and they're nice and friendly, but sometimes they are so unresponsive because they are at like different ends of the spectrum, I guess. 

    What you were saying about the interests, like, no they're not weird whatsoever. Things like that are quite interesting tbh, I don't share an interest in that kinda stuff, but there are definitely people who would. Once this pandemic is not as bad, then why don't you join some kinda club where you can meet people with those interests? Plus, you may actually find like-minded people there or something.

Children
No Data