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Unexpected start of assessment process tomorrow and it's thrown me

Deleted User

I asked my GP to refer my for an assessment in July / August and was told the waiting list was 12 - 18 months. In the meantime I decided to go private and am awaiting my assessment in January. Another reason for going private is that I feel I would get a fair assessment as the place has lots of experience with women. I think I mask very well.

I received a letter yesterday from the NHS referal place (for various reasons I only opened it yesterday when it was dated 27th Nov) to say I have an appointment tomorrow.

That's the only information on the letter - an appointment. So I rang up today and was told it's going to be a conversation to discuss development and family history. She said it's not necessary for my parents to attend but would help (it's an appointment over the phone). She said a more formal assessment would take place in due course at some point in the future.

I'm stressing out about this now. I wanted time to prepare so I don't miss things (even when I visit the GP I prepare cos I know I miss silly things out that might be obivous for some people to say but I only think about it afterwards). If I hadn't rang up, I woudn't have known anything about this as the letter just says "appointment". I've no idea what they are going to ask me so don't know what to prepare anyway.

Also the fact that my parents *could* attend but I haven't been brave enough to approach them about possibly being on the spectrum yet. I was working my way up to that as it's been asked they attend when I have the private assessment in Jan.

I'm still going to keep my appointment tomorrow and the private one in Jan. But it's going to be on my mind all tonight. It's just really thrown me today and added to an already stressful day with work. With the word "appointment" I was expecting more of an informal chat with a view to them saying "yes we will asess you" or "unfortunately we can't assess you".

I'm not looking for any answers from anyone. I just wanted to put it out there.

Parents
  • in reply to aidie

    Hi Aidie thanks for asking. It went ok. The person was very helpful & friendly and asked me to elaborate on things. I'm glad a) I had checked what the appointment was about and that b) while I hadn't had time to prepare, dug out the notes I sent my gp. If I hadn't done that I wouldve been floundering. I'm no good going in "cold". If I didn't know it was an assessment, I wouldn't have dug my notes out and wouldve found it hard to answer sufficiently. While questions were asked,  I feel the onus was on me to provide the info. I could do this having read up about it for a long time and having notes to hand. I had the foresight to expect general questions like "what's prompted you to go for assessment? " which I find difficult. ....well, how long is a piece of string? The fact I was expecting this and had my notes made it easier. 

    They said I had provided some good information, but I have to wait some months for the next phase. At this stage now, I don't know if I should keep my private assessment appointment in Jan,  or just cancel it and wait for the next part of my nhs one.

  • in reply to Deleted User

    cancel it i say , I'm sure u can rebook the private one again if need be.

    I'm happy it went ok and whats a few (9-12) months now.  you're on the correct path which is great.

    BTW the private ones can drag on more then u think and some people who have paid, I have seen here, ended up with the diagnosis they didnt expect ( they expected autism and got ADHD  ) and got very upset they had paid for it. 

    in mean time feel free to join in here

  • in reply to Deleted User
    Unknown said:
    But if that's the outcome which is right for them, then that's fair enough.

    I agree Slight smile

    yea thats the way i went in ---- i thought i had maybe at worst had "social anxiety" but came out rather shocked with autism. But i wanted the truth so i could do something about it. 

    yes you have the correct attitude which i think is quite important and actually part of the healing/acceptance  process.

  • in reply to aidie

    But if that's the outcome which is right for them, then that's fair enough.

    I don't want a label. I'm not wanting to pay for something so I get a positive AS outcome. I'm doing it because i need an answer about my life. One way or another. 

Reply Children
  • in reply to Deleted User
    Unknown said:
    But if that's the outcome which is right for them, then that's fair enough.

    I agree Slight smile

    yea thats the way i went in ---- i thought i had maybe at worst had "social anxiety" but came out rather shocked with autism. But i wanted the truth so i could do something about it. 

    yes you have the correct attitude which i think is quite important and actually part of the healing/acceptance  process.