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Not being able to let go of things

Discombobulated

Hi all,

So it's only recently been noticed that I'm likely to have ASD/aspergers and not formally diagnosed. I'm still on my journey of discovering who I actually am. I've taken great comfort recently in the idea that I may have ASD as it explains a lot of things that I previously felt were 'wrong' with me.

Here's my question (with background): *Possible trigger - cancer

I've not had a particularly good couple of days as I've found out a work colleague has 3-6 months to live... out of nowhere! So I've been more sensitive to things I think. I had a little panic today because I got too warm when I was washing up! Haha. Tonight I was having a conversation with my OH and he asked me to explain something to him about fractions. Great! I love maths! However, he kept interrupting and then said he wanted to know something else. He ended up raising his voice and said it didn't matter. I said I'd like to know what he wanted to know so I could explain it (I got really caught up on it). He asked me why I needed to know when it no longer mattered to him and I said I didn't know, I couldn't explain why I needed to do it but I couldn't just leave it. This isn't the first time this has happened either. He said that it didn't matter anymore to him. I said it did to me but he kept refusing. I snapped. I screamed "I just need to know" burst into tears, threw my pen and paper down and ran to my bed (my safe place), hid under a weighted blanket and rocked and cried.

I understand that the 'meltdown' (if that's what it was?) was because of a build up of things throughout the day/past few days. What I'm curious about is my NEED to understand something, the need to understand what he means. Is this an aspie/ASD thing? It really bothers me. I hate not understanding and I hate even more that I can't explain why I need to know. I feel so frustrated.

Any thoughts would be appreciated.

Parents

  • i would say u're good as mats and OH isnt. When asked to show him maths u may have gone into an explanation without watching him for feedback on how he is learning. Teaching/tutoring is difficult. 

    step 1. explain one small step , ask do u understand ? if u doubt this step hasnt sunk in, step back try a different way

    step 2  as above keep asking r u ok do u understand ......encouage feedback from the pupil its not a lecture

    step 3 as above

    target reached hopefully

    if u're teaching isnt working redirect him to a video  then try again. ask if he really wants to learn something encourage him to do classes as he is really smart etc . 

    just trying to help.

    Heart

Reply

  • i would say u're good as mats and OH isnt. When asked to show him maths u may have gone into an explanation without watching him for feedback on how he is learning. Teaching/tutoring is difficult. 

    step 1. explain one small step , ask do u understand ? if u doubt this step hasnt sunk in, step back try a different way

    step 2  as above keep asking r u ok do u understand ......encouage feedback from the pupil its not a lecture

    step 3 as above

    target reached hopefully

    if u're teaching isnt working redirect him to a video  then try again. ask if he really wants to learn something encourage him to do classes as he is really smart etc . 

    just trying to help.

    Heart

Children