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Work got weird

Cookiesmum1986

so following on from my last post asking if I should come out fully at work. I am not out but my manager has known all along.

I was redeployed due to covid and I found the disorganisation a nightmare, to top it off I was having to work around my husband taking me to and from work due to public transport being off and he was working 18 hour days, my work gave 0 consideration to this despite me not driving for medical reasons (disclosed) and my husband also working within the NHS and his job being critical to covid.

Anyway I kind of knew I'd struggle with the upheaval of going back and asked occupational health for help and they said fill out this giant stress management form (50+ pages), I said I'm not stressed I'm autistic and they said you sound stressed to us, because apparently you can diagnose over the phone with your kids in the background.

As predicted going back was also a nightmare and my manager sent me home because she was worried for my mental health. I saw my GP and he was like what are your work on? You're not mentally ill you're autistic, did no one think to talk you through the changes or you know phone you in 8 weeks? Work tried to refer me to occupational health and they said they wouldn't see me because I'd seen my GP.

I was off a week, I'm back and I'm kind of fine. Still settling in. Performance wise at work they can't fault me (their words) but today my manager said they're referring me back to occupational health because her manager (who has met me once) has concerns about me and how I'd cope on placement (I'm also a student nurse) if an emergency happens. I'm like well I'd be fine, I'd do what I'm trained to do. How do you explain to someone that you're more put out by the wrong coloured socks than you are someone decking it? Anyway if Occupational health decide to not do anything I need to have a case review with HR and tonnes of managers and this doesn't seem right? I've only ever heard of these things when someone has royally f***** up and like I say they keep saying my work is perfect.

its like my mask fell at work and now that they've had to confront the reality of me being autistic and not just autistic on a bit of paper suddenly I'm a liability when actually I'm one of the safest members of staff in there. 

I'm really worried about this case review thing, I mean how can I be facing HR when I have a good track record? I've literally done nothing wrong except be born autistic and this is the crap I get for having a couple of bad days in 5 years? No one was ever at risk, I was redeployed to a cupboard! 

Parents
  • Cookiesmum1986 said:
    Anyway I kind of knew I'd struggle with the upheaval of going back and asked occupational health for help and they said fill out this giant stress management form (50+ pages), I said I'm not stressed I'm autistic and they said you sound stressed to us, because apparently you can diagnose over the phone with your kids in the background.

    You appear to be VERY VERY stressed - a classic trait of autism is not being able to deal with stress/anxiety so it will cause you to appear 'odd'.

    I think you need to have a long look at yourself and read through questions in the 50 page form to maybe see that you are refusing to acknowledge the insane stress in your life.    It sounds like the form could be your way to maybe get some support in the environment.

Reply
  • Cookiesmum1986 said:
    Anyway I kind of knew I'd struggle with the upheaval of going back and asked occupational health for help and they said fill out this giant stress management form (50+ pages), I said I'm not stressed I'm autistic and they said you sound stressed to us, because apparently you can diagnose over the phone with your kids in the background.

    You appear to be VERY VERY stressed - a classic trait of autism is not being able to deal with stress/anxiety so it will cause you to appear 'odd'.

    I think you need to have a long look at yourself and read through questions in the 50 page form to maybe see that you are refusing to acknowledge the insane stress in your life.    It sounds like the form could be your way to maybe get some support in the environment.

Children
  • in reply to Plastic

    Well I'm stressed now!

    The form is all about stuff that isn't relevant like "how much control do you have over the tasks you carry out" and at the time when I was told to fill in the form that's what I was wanting to know, what tasks I was going back to (our services haven't returned to normal) so how could I answer the question?

    I told my manager that this had happened when I came back from deployment and everything had settled a bit and she said it's fine and I didn't need to fill the form in (the last half of the form is how can the department style questions and I can't ever answer this sort of thing, I have almost no ability to answer open questions like that).

    I mean I'd happily sit down and fill the form in but it's not in a format that I can work with, lots of "in what way can the department...." questions and I don't do well with those, I can't imagine measures that will help. I just know it's distracting as hell being told I'm working in one clinic and then 2 minutes before my shift being told actually it's a different one but I've just got on with it.