Published on 12, July, 2020
I wanted to reach out and ask... how have people found the world of dating? Or those who have had relationships or are in one, how did it actually happen for you?
My dating history hasn’t been great so far and especially with me being of an age where lots of my friends are getting married, buying houses together and having kids, it adds to my anxiety that my life is basically stuck at the start. I don’t live in a great location for social opportunities and realistically I’m going to have a partner 40 miles away but I am ok with that. Some friends have suggested to move away to widen my pool of people but I really don’t think I could cope with that since it would be a massive change and right now I need a lot of family support.
Obviously while the coronavirus is a thing physically meeting people is going to be tricky but me and my mum both agree that there’s no reason why me and a date couldn’t just sit in a park at a distance from each other and chat. It isn’t a complete blocker. But in the current climate I think dating sites are really the only way forward, though I am open to suggestions.
So far I’ve registered on two, which my mum has been great supporting me with as I lack confidence. Not sure if I’m allowed to mention them but I have serious doubts about them. One has so few people on it and the people I’ve been matched with don’t seem very active. The other seems more active generally but there are few people near me and there’s no way of telling when they were last on, and wouldn’t be surprised if they are not active themselves.
There seems to be so few quality sites set up for autistic people and I’m nervous about entering the mainstream ones. Or needn’t I be? I really want to be with someone who understands me and I think definitely that common ground of autism has to be a good thing?
I also wondered about the agency they use on The Undateables, but wonder how useful this would be in the current climate (really wish this virus would go away!!!). Any thoughts, anyone?
I found dating complicated and awkward. It was a disaster from start to finish, no wonder he didn't ask me for a second date.
I completely understand Unirella. What if it were easier to meet other people on the spectrum and you could get advice on dating? Please be a part of my focus group so I can create something that works well for people on the spectrum. If you’re comfortable with helping (all I require is a little of your time), can you email me and I can provide further details: [email address removed by Moderator]
Thank you
Thanks rkj, that's nice of you to offer but the problem isn't really that I need advice the problem is that I choose not to date now because my asd meant that we were too different. I have no problem attracting people and getting dates but they never work out because of my autistic personality and you can't change who you are, and nor should you come to that.