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mouse2

I recently tried to help an organisation as I thought it the right thing to do

The organisation publicly tagged myself and my team into pictures saying thank you for our work. The pictures were of a different area so I was confused but left it at that. Then the main person said one person had done most of the work but hadn't wanted to be named. 1 he had no work or very little in his area (the area I was associated with) and 2 he didnt even wave and treated us with contempt if we ever crossed paths. But I ignored it.

Now alot of people have been upset by pretty much vandalism in this area he was in. People saw us tagged on facebook and blamed us. Theres a hate campaign type thing going on. I'm losing sleep and getting asked on my daily walks why it happened and I genuinely dont know.

I commented on one post saying I'm genuinely sorry it happened and dont agree with it but it wasent us and I said what work we done.

I then got a private message from the organiser telling me not to reply publicly! I replied I will if we're getting accused of something we havent done.

I waited as I hoped she would put people straight. She didnt.

Speaking to a fellow volunteer I hear it was the organiser and her partner and they took great joy in it.

I cant prove this, but it makes sense why he didnt want to be tagged, they didnt actually need us they were quite capable it turned out. 

I honestly feel this has been a set up to pin their sketchy deeds onto us

So today I'm calling the boss, they will have an ultimatum. They publically tell people we're not involved or I will be doing it for them

I'm worried, I get shaky, I've again lost faith in humanity. 

I shouldnt have to deal with this by trying to do the right thing. I'm disgusted and disappointed. Scared and anxious. I've melted down, shutdown, lost sleep

Why do people think they can do this to us?

Parents

  • Power. 
    They think they control you and you will be powerless to fight back. It’s abuse and it’s cruel. Sadly there are too many people around who are on ego trips and are narcissistic in their behaviour. I’ve been on the receiving end myself and all you can do is stand up for yourself or let it lie. There are very few allies in cases like this because others are scared of what might happen to them. I’m often the lone voice but I know, if I don’t say anything, it will haunt me. 

    Good luck. 

  • in reply to 2Weevils

    Thank you, your right of course. You trust once more then it happens again 

  • in reply to mouse2

    I was once very trusting but find that as I grow older, I question more and become more cynical. 
    A long time ago a manager of mine reported that I didn’t deal well with management. I disagreed. I said I didn’t cope well with poor management. I didn’t cope with illogical management. 
    I try to help people and will do so enthusiastically if I understand and agree with their principles and I feel supported and enthused. If I am not then I really struggle. 
    Trust is paramount. I need them to follow through on their promises, I need them to give me since and time and understanding, and to appreciate that I’m Autistic and not just one of the crowd. 
    But that is easy to betray. Good intentions quickly fall by the wayside as they find it’s too much effort when they have to accommodate you separately from others and too often I find my trust collapses because it’s been built in quicksand or it was expedient to agree at the beginning but not now. 
    Sometimes, sadly, it’s easier not to trust and remain detached at all times. A sad indictment of the world we live in. 

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  • in reply to mouse2

    I was once very trusting but find that as I grow older, I question more and become more cynical. 
    A long time ago a manager of mine reported that I didn’t deal well with management. I disagreed. I said I didn’t cope well with poor management. I didn’t cope with illogical management. 
    I try to help people and will do so enthusiastically if I understand and agree with their principles and I feel supported and enthused. If I am not then I really struggle. 
    Trust is paramount. I need them to follow through on their promises, I need them to give me since and time and understanding, and to appreciate that I’m Autistic and not just one of the crowd. 
    But that is easy to betray. Good intentions quickly fall by the wayside as they find it’s too much effort when they have to accommodate you separately from others and too often I find my trust collapses because it’s been built in quicksand or it was expedient to agree at the beginning but not now. 
    Sometimes, sadly, it’s easier not to trust and remain detached at all times. A sad indictment of the world we live in. 

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