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Awful awful day ending in tears

mouse2
over 3 years ago

I just cant figure people out. I really cant. I dont try I mess things up, i try and mess things up.

Started off someone feeling underappreciated on a project so i bought her a bottle of wine and messaged saying will leave it for her (social distancing) and said it's a thank you for all you do. Well this caused offence and i was told to keep it! I apologised saying I'm sorry I meant it as appreciation and no offence. I've never said anything about her I barely know her but I was organising the work

Then upset someone I've known for 5 minutes. I'd cancelled plans the other night explained I get anxious meeting new people etc. Then she explained she understood and if I ever want to talk shes there. Was really nice. Today I've not seen her at all but someone i thought was a friend, her husband who's meant to help with a medical issue knew that I was meant to be working today (never met him and decided not to use him  as I cant find his credentials) anyway he turns up and this new lady was there. He starts telling her about why I'd called him! ! Blatant data protection issue for a start. She said I'll stop you there and she messaged me saying he told me about your issue! (Nothing disturbing at all but I dont want to disclose for my identity) anyway the lady I hoped to be friends with said I need distance from you (meaning me) my potential new friend gone. I asked my husband to check my messages but nothing untoward. 

I ended up in tears as I try so bloody hard but mess up. Why cant I have 1 friend? I'm honest, caring, kind. I get hurt alot

Parents
  • over 3 years ago

    Hi, I'm so sorry that you are down about this. I read the story  several times and simply couldn't understand it either (ie. what makes the twist that leads to rejection?).

    I almost felt myself sinking into despondency as I read it and recognised my own experiences and failure to make friends.

    As Plastic said, don't stop being yourself and being nice. There can be other reasons why they don't want a friend at the moment, such as too many friends already that all need reciprocal actions and catch up calls.

    People can also feel spooked by kindness, when the world and work life is so rough then unexpected  generosity can be misunderstood and mistrusted, as explained by Deepthought

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  • over 3 years ago

    Hi, I'm so sorry that you are down about this. I read the story  several times and simply couldn't understand it either (ie. what makes the twist that leads to rejection?).

    I almost felt myself sinking into despondency as I read it and recognised my own experiences and failure to make friends.

    As Plastic said, don't stop being yourself and being nice. There can be other reasons why they don't want a friend at the moment, such as too many friends already that all need reciprocal actions and catch up calls.

    People can also feel spooked by kindness, when the world and work life is so rough then unexpected  generosity can be misunderstood and mistrusted, as explained by Deepthought

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