This is something which bugs me a lot so I’ve decided to voice it - I’ve seen it in here and in the world around me and it seems to be happening more and more - people playing the autism card. For absolute clarity, I wholeheartedly believe employers etc should make reasonable adjustments for ASD where there is a genuine need, but too often I am seeing people try to use their autism as a means of getting more or justifying actions which aren’t right.
As someone on the spectrum, I don’t want to stand out, I don’t want others thinking I’m getting specialist treatment or get away with stuff because I’m autistic. Drawing attention to the autistic cause negatively isn’t going to help anyone, least of all ourselves.
For example people have posted on here saying they feel they should get to break social distancing/ lockdown rules because they are autistic (despite the fact that this puts them and others at risk), a year or two back I knew an autistic guy who set off an alarm because he didn’t get his way, the real reason was because he was annoyed at someone and generally throws his toys out of the pram when he doesn’t get his own way - his defence was ‘I am autistic’ - so I challenged him on this, and he eventually conceded that he used his ASD to cover up for his behaviours. The same I feel applies to violence or other bad/ anti-social behaviour - there is a huge difference between a trait being activated and a learned behaviour to deal with it. If someone says ‘I hit that person because I wasn’t coping with a particular trait being triggered’ - that’s a fair statement. To say It hit that person because I’m autistic’ is not - I accept there are links and I gave more sympathy for young children on this one who don’t understand law, social norms and values etc but as adults we have to take responsibility for ourselves and our actions.
So yes we should (if we want to) disclose ASD so as reasonable adjustments are made, but I wish people would stop misusing autism as an excuse where it shouldn’t be used. I worry people will tire of ‘but it’s because I’m autistic’ to the extent that genuine needs will get brushed aside - so everybody loses.
We live in a Rat Race. A society where NTs will deceive and cheat and step on other’s toes to get what They want.
If we have to cheat like they do to fit in - so be it. Tuff titties...Needs must.
I disagree but that aside my rant wasn’t about fitting in more people using autism as an excuse to justify wrong doing. I’ve done plenty wrong in my life, but I have the balls to say that it’s me who screwed up - I don’t go “oh well I have autism” in the hope that it justifies something. If too many start doing that, genuine needs get overlooked.
But do you use your autism to get discounts at places or to get a 'carer' in free or use the system to get what you want? It's all the same thing, isn't it?
As NAS65871 says, we're in a rat race - and although it may not justify it, I've been trodden on so many times that I don't feel guilty about 'using' the system to my advantage if I can. It's helpful in airports, shopping, travel, entry to places that are crazy expensive etc. - and if I could use it to get out of trouble, I would.
I have a great need to 'do the right thing' - but in these days of chaos and greed, it's getting difficult to measure the threshold of right and wrong - and if you set your standard too low, you're just a sucker.
You mentioned (entry to places that are crazy expensive etc)
What kind of places?....i ask as i barely, t(hrough lack of knowledge), use any possible assists....ie shopping?...what could i do as someone with Autism and semi disabled, get at a shop? i feel ive been diagnosed last year..And beyond my blue badge for my physical issues....I dont get ANY assists for the Autism..
Not sure ive asked clearly...but do you get what i mean?....what benefits are there which you mention
many thanks in advance.
Hi - if you get the Sunflower Lanyard and photocopy your blue badge, most museum or theme parks or other entertainment will let you in on a discounted price and also let your 'carer' (a friend) go in for free so it works out less than half price each, You can get a disabled rail / bus pass and discount cinema tickets. Places like Duxford Air Museum are about £20 each - it discounts to £18 and a free carer - so just £9 each
Shopping - with the lanyard, they should let you go straight in - no queueing up - and you can have a helper with you - also, some shops will allocate a shopping assistant to you to help you around the shop.
Airports - the disability support people will walk you through the VIP security so you don't queue and you should be able to pre-board.
Hotels - I always get the top floor so I don't get the 'herd of elephants' moving around above me in the night.
Also - you can ask for special experiences and lots of businesses will try to help make your experience better - like a behind the scenes tour at Legoland
Just be polite and use your imagination - and let your friend do the talking so they feel sorry for you.