Unable to come to terms with bad events and move on - Is this all autism

I found great benefit on this from mindfulness training (in context of philosophy of self-compassion and emotional resilience short courses tend to leave out). Though short mindfulness courses without context can be dangerous for us as they lead to increase in sensory overload without the resilience aspect, and people pleasing without the self-compassion. Also they can expose deeper issues like c-ptsd which need more time to work though. If there are any ongoing meditation groups accessible to you I give them a look, check how well you can communicate with the 'tutor' before starting if possible.

Tai-chi is also helpful, particularly if you want a stronger focus on resilience aspect that maybe of more help to you.

Sadly many therapists assume we can learn these things in the same way neuro-typicals can, and this often leads to disaster. Short term courses are great for many, but not suited to us. However be aware as I said deeper issues can emerge, and seeing a qualified therapist if that happens is a good idea.

Thanks yes I have tried tai chi and now had some thousands of hours of psychotherapy and now have the feeling that my psychotherapist, as some here, are feeling negative countertransference: ie anger that I am not improving or going away. Hence they view me as being manipulative . This is a common reaction to people with chronic suicidal distress, but is minute in magnitude compared with that experienced by the person with distress.

I'd also look for a reason other then regret. Something you want to build or become in the world to replace the fixation on past events. Not fixating on anything is infinitely harder then actively fixating on a positive activity.

Indeed, I used to volunteer steaming clothes in local MIND myself. I find I start to struggle over time when distanced from the results of what I so though, being hands on with the problem and seeing the difference made really boost my motivation and ambition to make a bigger difference.

The ability the internet gives us to interact in a tangible rather then abstract way while still ensuring we can control and limit the nature and extent of that interaction, or just unplug for a while, is an amazing tool. 

yes but the MIND shop where I work acts a good social welfare place, even though the volunteers do lots of work for very little outcome. Work is good for health of the mind

yes but the MIND shop where I work acts a good social welfare place, even though the volunteers do lots of work for very little outcome. Work is good for health of the mind

Indeed, I used to volunteer steaming clothes in local MIND myself. I find I start to struggle over time when distanced from the results of what I so though, being hands on with the problem and seeing the difference made really boost my motivation and ambition to make a bigger difference.

The ability the internet gives us to interact in a tangible rather then abstract way while still ensuring we can control and limit the nature and extent of that interaction, or just unplug for a while, is an amazing tool.