Work disciplinary

I'm new here,but after some advice.my son has asperger and has just had a disciplinary at work in relation to social media comments.He has worked for the company for 7 years,has an exemplary record,and it is his first offence.He is very good at hiding his asperger s but has always been honest, most staff know he's on the spectrum.The whole disciplinary process has heightened his anxiety which he has tried to explain,he received the letter for investigating 30 minutes before meeting,with limited information of what he had been accused of,which made him panic,questions sent him into sensory overload,room became smaller and he felt alone.It is difficult for him o relate social media policy to his actions, can be impulsive,doesn't always realise consequences of actions.He only name company once,other flagged comments are general observations,he used hashtag work,but did not put my work, so in his mind could relate to any work,and nowhere does it mention where he works.During the disciplinary the manager chairing the meeting said I quote" so you want preferential treatment because you are aspergic",to which he replied no,in 7 years I've never asked for preferential treatment, and I'm not asking now.He is to be issued  with a written warning,that will remain on his file for year.Any advice much appreciated.

Parents
  • In these hearings, one is usually allowed to bring in an independent witness or even an advocate to speak on their behalf.

    I strongly suggest he does not go alone, but with someone more experienced in these matters.

  • He didn't have anyone with him for for investigating, but a union rep,went to disciplinary hearing,the rep feels he could appeal because his aspergers wasn't taken seriously,and the whole procedure wasn't done right, but he doesn't know what to do.We think there's an issue with manager asking if he wanted preferential treatment,as how it was phrased doesn t seem right, Thank you for reply I'm at a loss what he should do.

  • I would always take the Union advice. I am Unite and my Union Reps were brilliant when a Senior manager tried to move me into another group at work (against my will), as I was accused of making derogatory remarks about the Senior Management. Of course they couldn't back their allegations up, especially when it was supposed to have occurred over 18 months ago.As soon as the Union rep threatened to take further action, they all backed down.

    So now things have settled down, although they tried to get me to decide (in two days) whether to take voluntary redundancy. My Union Rep went ballistic because (1) they knew about my recent Autism diagnosis (the accusations  made to me, kick started the whole Autism diagnosis) and (2) They didn't invite my Union Rep to support me.

    Again they quickly backed down, saying it was all a misunderstanding.

    However, I don't ever mention my work or Company name on Social Media for the very reason your son has be picked up on.

    The warning for a year is standard and you should ignore it and move on.

    However, longer term your son IS entitled to a little more flexibility because of Asperger's BUT only if he has an official diagnosis.

    If he hasn't got one, then he should seek one ASAP

  • we are trying to achieve equity. your son is the guy on 2 boxes.   below mentions this as well.

  • He's just remembered something else they said, they suggested he's putting himself in a box and discriminating against himself ???from what he is saying the disciplinary meeting went totally off course, will be interesting if he receives a copy of the meeting, apparently there are about 15 pages!!

  • Thankyou,and will let you know,the venting frustration and reasons for doing so sound so familiar

  • Well they dont call Aspergers/Autism a Disability for nothing! I've lost count of the times I have vented my frustration (caused by the stress of the job) - ususlly being critical of the lack of support and or poor management decisions, that have caused even more stress for me !!!

    Anyway, your son is acting as a perfectly normal Aspie :):)

    Let us know how things develop!

  • My son agrees completely,he's remembering more things as the day has gone on,he's feeling much calmer now,as he is processing things more logically, and listening to advice, from yourself and others so thankyou, it's helping me too! He s going to speak to union again and take it from there.I will keep people informed

  • Wise words Aidie :)

  • And that's the problem!! We Aspies just sit and nod and agree to everything that is said, sometimes with a smile it's called "Social Masking"

    The trouble is that you putting so much effort in trying to "appear" engaged when in fact you can't process what's actually been said to you, well not until well after the meeting has finished.And even then it can take hours to truly comprehend what was going on :)

    That's why you must have someone present!!

Reply
  • And that's the problem!! We Aspies just sit and nod and agree to everything that is said, sometimes with a smile it's called "Social Masking"

    The trouble is that you putting so much effort in trying to "appear" engaged when in fact you can't process what's actually been said to you, well not until well after the meeting has finished.And even then it can take hours to truly comprehend what was going on :)

    That's why you must have someone present!!

Children
  • we are trying to achieve equity. your son is the guy on 2 boxes.   below mentions this as well.

  • He's just remembered something else they said, they suggested he's putting himself in a box and discriminating against himself ???from what he is saying the disciplinary meeting went totally off course, will be interesting if he receives a copy of the meeting, apparently there are about 15 pages!!

  • Thankyou,and will let you know,the venting frustration and reasons for doing so sound so familiar

  • Well they dont call Aspergers/Autism a Disability for nothing! I've lost count of the times I have vented my frustration (caused by the stress of the job) - ususlly being critical of the lack of support and or poor management decisions, that have caused even more stress for me !!!

    Anyway, your son is acting as a perfectly normal Aspie :):)

    Let us know how things develop!

  • My son agrees completely,he's remembering more things as the day has gone on,he's feeling much calmer now,as he is processing things more logically, and listening to advice, from yourself and others so thankyou, it's helping me too! He s going to speak to union again and take it from there.I will keep people informed