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i"m wondering if my partner is Autistic, how do i approach this please

NAS65188

Hello there, thank you for being out there to talk to. I have been with my partner for nearly 3 years and feel he is an active autistic adult. i have taken the test myself and since doing so thought it would be a good way to broach the topic with him. How do i pursue this, without pressure. This is personal and i dont want to list the reasons i feel this way, wouldnt want to embarrass him. i would like to go forward in our relationship and i really believe that looking towards this would help us, both, greatly. Is there anyone out there who has helped, or been helped, by the partner to get the test/help to go forward? thank you for your time. i look forward to hearing from you. Thank you for your time. 

Parents

  • Hi. I'd just recommend caution when using online tests - there are a lot of bogus tests out there that aren't based on scientific evidence. Some legitimate tests can be a good indicator of autism, but still wouldn't replace a formal diagnostic assessment. 

    Rather than getting him to do a test, it might be useful to have a look at some of the autistic traits listed on the NAS website to see if any of them sound familiar. You could always say you were reading some interesting information about autism and lots of it sounded quite familiar, and ask whether he's ever thought about it. 

    The important thing is not to rush him into making any decisions. Once you've had the initial conversation, give him some time to process it. It took me years to decide I wanted a diagnosis, and some people prefer not to have one - everyone has to make their own choice in this case. It's also good to know that your partner will stick around whether you're diagnosed as autistic or not, so just be supportive and make it clear that it wouldn't change the way you thought of him.

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  • Hi. I'd just recommend caution when using online tests - there are a lot of bogus tests out there that aren't based on scientific evidence. Some legitimate tests can be a good indicator of autism, but still wouldn't replace a formal diagnostic assessment. 

    Rather than getting him to do a test, it might be useful to have a look at some of the autistic traits listed on the NAS website to see if any of them sound familiar. You could always say you were reading some interesting information about autism and lots of it sounded quite familiar, and ask whether he's ever thought about it. 

    The important thing is not to rush him into making any decisions. Once you've had the initial conversation, give him some time to process it. It took me years to decide I wanted a diagnosis, and some people prefer not to have one - everyone has to make their own choice in this case. It's also good to know that your partner will stick around whether you're diagnosed as autistic or not, so just be supportive and make it clear that it wouldn't change the way you thought of him.

Children
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