I seem to attract one horrible person after another, by that I mean people who look to do you harm. I'm staying in more now and go to quiet things when I need social interaction but I still come across awful people. I honestly dont understand why this is. I'm exhausted once more from working out situations, peoples intentions, 'what if' thoughts. Tired of shut downs when I need urgently to take action (something awful happened recently and I shut down, I couldnt stop myself from it I felt useless and I let someone down in a huge way)
The thing is, I can stay in all week and go out just once and something can happen that regular people have no experience of. I want to stay home indefinatly but I know that I cant as I'm a parent. I just feel helpless and a rubbish parent as I cant decipher people in time or I shut down completely
Im just so tired. Ive called the Samaratans twice these last few days, As usual you cant get into the GP's. This one incident has shaken me to the core, it was by someone you should be able to trust too. I feel so tired right now :(
