Unsure If I Have Asperger's or Just Anxiety

Your GP sounds ridiculous. Also, she must have been living under a rock if she hasn't heard all the news stories and statistics about undiagnosed adults (particularly women).

I didn't get help from my GP either (he falsely told me there were no autism services in my area), so I self-referred to my local NHS mental health service (you can usually do this online). I requested a face-to-face appointment with a mental health assessor and he was the one who actually referred me for an autism diagnosis, even though it's not a mental health condition. He got me help with my anxiety and OCD, in addition to building and submitting a case for an autism referral. If you can go down this route, I'd really recommend giving it a try.

So I went to the GP and she told me, literally in her words, "you're too old to be diagnosed with Asperger's, people are usually diagnosed when they are six".

She couldn't even direct me to anyone who could help.

She said my issues are likely due to anxiety and OCD because of my age. Not really sure where I go from here.

Good luck. I hope you’ll find your answer soon. I’ve been waiting for my assessment for 2 years now and I’m still doubting myself. Is it autism or just anxiety? Is it autism or sensory processing disorder or maybe it’s something completely “normal”? Maybe it’s just extremely low stress tolerance? And communication problems? Maybe I’m just super introverted with awful social skills? I don’t know. Especially that I don’t really feel connected to others, on the spectrum or not. I just don’t know what to do with people, what to say to them. It would be perfect if I could connect to people the way I can connect to dogs or cats - just look at them, be with them, sit or walk with them. Skip talking altogether.

I'm sorry to hear you're struggling at the moment. When I first saw a mental health assessor, I was referred for both mental health support and an autism assessment (I'm still waiting for the assessment). I've been through therapy for anxiety and I'm currently in therapy for OCD; both have helped me hugely with improving my mental health. It's absolutely possible to have autism, anxiety and OCD together. It's still worth chatting to your GP, or your counsellor, if you'd like to pursue an autism referral.

The NAS website has a good overview of autism symptoms, so it may be worth writing down examples of how they apply to you - you can then share these with your GP or counsellor.

I hope you find therapy helpful and get the answers you're looking for.

Thank you for this. I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow which is the first time I will mention this possibility of Asperger's to them. There are a number of things I experience and I don't know if this is indicative of just typical anxiety or Asperger's.

-Unable to think of anything to say to people. This is even when I know them and I'm not anxious. I'd rather just sit quietly.

-I can't bear noise. I hate loud and TVs etc. And if I hear a small repetitive noise I have to find out what it is and stop it. Most other people do not hear or notice the noise.

-I am known to be awkward, and people make jokes about this and call me characters from TV and cartoons.

-I don't like hand holding, hugs or any physical contact. The only time I feel comfortable doing so is when I am drunk. 

-Don't like people touching my food, handling my food, etc. This is not because of germs, I'm not sure what it is.

-I have to have structures and procedures for everything. I can't do anything unexpected.

-I cannot make decisions. I'm not sure if this is due to confidence issues.

Hello,

I'm sorry to hear you're in distress. I can only offer my experience, as I'm sure others will. 

Before diagnosis, I was totally ignorant about what autism actually is until it was suggested to me by a counsellor. As I learned more about it, it was obvious to me that I have Aspergers. The reason I was so certain, is that I have always experienced the following: 

-Problems with people

-Problems with noise (including exaggerated startle reflex since infancy; I have developed a complex about this as it can be very embarrassing)

-Obsession with technical subjects

-Postural problems 

-Difficulty with physical gestures (e.g. hugs, handshakes, getting up out of my seat)

-Difficulty with facial expressions (knowing what to do and when)

-Poor short term memory 

-Excellent rote memory

-Fear of change

-Difficulty with open-ended questions 

-Difficulty making decisions

... As you can see, I am a pretty textbook Aspie. I have also since been diagnosed with ADHD. Do any of the above apply to you? 

I think if I were to advise you to do one thing, it would be to leave the final say to the diagnostician(s), whatever your suspicions may be at this point. Sometimes it takes a long time for things to unravel and become clear. 

Good luck on your journey, 

Tintal

Ps: one thing you can do starting right now is try some practical adjustments aimed at helping autistic people, and see if they help you, e.g. 

-Create structure / routines for yourself

-Modify your environment to minimise harsh stimuli (e.g. with headphones / glasses etc)

-Identify potential stressors (e.g. parties / work socialising) and give yourself a temporary rest from them

See if these things help. Bear in mind, if you are diagnosed, this is what you will have to do (make informed adjustments for yourself). 

It's as though I don't know how to communicate. I try to copy people and I find I mimic people a lot when I am with them and change to suit whoever I am with. It is as though I don't have an identity, I am boring and bland as myself so I copy others because I have no idea what I should be doing.

I hope this makes sense and would appreciate any advice.