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Anyone understand "Banter"

mars36

I work in a male dominated industry and maybe this also applies to more mixed or female work places too but most of my colleagues indulge in "banter" where they trade ever increasing insults to the point where I am cringing with embarrassment ,I say this as an observer I stay well clear of any of this and have no wish to ever do so  for fear of saying the wrong thing ,I listen sometimes and think they have really crossed the line this time but no offence is taken ,but I would be always be thinking I had  upset someone even if it appeared I had not, occasionally someone will try to do this to me and I just do not know how to respond usually its someone who does not know me those that know me don't bother, I get the humour behind it all but  this to me is a hidden mine field of invisible trip wires and have no idea what the rules are so as I say stay well clear of it ,but does any one else have this experience particularly the cringing embarrassment .    

Parents

  • I think it serves numerous purposes - people do it for humour and entertainment (especially common in the boring jobs I've worked), to start a conversation, to exercise their wit, and to test the boundaries. Like you say there is the worry that you'll say the wrong thing - I think that's part of the plan, because then they know what they can and can't talk/joke about in a more serious situation. It's basically one of those arcane social skills that don't come naturally to everyone. It's not required but can be useful.

    It was confusing to me the first few times, because I saw a lot of football banter. Where I grew up, people got jumped for supporting the wrong team (which is always the other team, from the attacker's perspective). Thankfully I don't support a football team, or that could've gone terribly wrong Stuck out tongue

    There's nothing inately malicious about it so it's usually nothing to worry about, though some malicious people can use it to bully others as well.

    If you ever want to try your hand at banter, here's some tips:

    DO start with something unimportant like their haircut, their mannerisms, their tastes, something like that.
    DON'T slag their family or religion unless you know what you're doing.

Reply

  • I think it serves numerous purposes - people do it for humour and entertainment (especially common in the boring jobs I've worked), to start a conversation, to exercise their wit, and to test the boundaries. Like you say there is the worry that you'll say the wrong thing - I think that's part of the plan, because then they know what they can and can't talk/joke about in a more serious situation. It's basically one of those arcane social skills that don't come naturally to everyone. It's not required but can be useful.

    It was confusing to me the first few times, because I saw a lot of football banter. Where I grew up, people got jumped for supporting the wrong team (which is always the other team, from the attacker's perspective). Thankfully I don't support a football team, or that could've gone terribly wrong Stuck out tongue

    There's nothing inately malicious about it so it's usually nothing to worry about, though some malicious people can use it to bully others as well.

    If you ever want to try your hand at banter, here's some tips:

    DO start with something unimportant like their haircut, their mannerisms, their tastes, something like that.
    DON'T slag their family or religion unless you know what you're doing.

Children
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