Published on 12, July, 2020
I asked my GP to refer me for assessment in August and have received a bunch of questionnaires from the ASD assessment service - autism spectrum quotient, empathy quotient, one for somebody who knew me as a child and one for someone who knows me well now.
So I asked my parents to complete the one about my childhood, and my mum has completed parts of it. Though she has left blank the observational type questions, instead adding a note to say that it was too long ago and she can't remember. Which is fair enough but aside from a yes/no tick box section all that she's provided is a comment saying that I was late talking, "shy, quiet and reserved" and that she didn't notice anything that she thinks was out of the ordinary. I'm not entirely surprised as she hasn't been particularly supportive of my seeking diagnosis and thinks that I wasn't like some autistic children she knows so I can't have ASD. Though I was hoping she would at least complete it, even if her recollections of my childhood are so different from mine.
I still need to ask someone who knows me now, but feeling really awkward about approaching friends about this, as not sure that anybody knows me that well. I'm not particularly good at keeping in regular contact with friends, so would be the first time I'd spoken to them in months (or longer...). One of the questions on the observational bit includes one with an example of "only initiates social interaction to ask for help" also makes me feel embarrassed about asking them!
The letter from the ASD psychologist stated that I'd be removed from the waiting list if I didn't return the completed questionnaires within a month including at least one of the ones somebody who knew me as a child or now, which worries me as not sure if my mum's one counts as completed! Also if my parents aren't going to be willing to provide much information about my childhood, will it be much harder to get a diagnosis?
It's frustrating. The more I read about ASD, the more it feels like it fits. But I'm doubting whether it's worth going through the stress of seeking diagnosis if it's going to be difficult to provide the evidence to back it up, beyond what I say.
If your mum has filled in what she can, it's complete :) I wouldn't worry too much about it, it sounds like the information she has provided sounds helpful, it shouldn't matter too much that there are other things she can't remember. That's pretty common with adults, that their parents don't remember much, and it's only one part of the picture they are trying to build up of you.
My mum only mentioned a couple of things for my assessment about my childhood (that I was shy and quiet and tended to have younger friends as a kid, that I had trouble with eye contact with strangers but had got better at it) and a few things relating to now (that I was very socially awkward and often left it to the other person if a conversation wasn't something I was interested in, and that I liked to repeat things). It was a few lines really, but since it added to and was consistent with the overall picture of what information I'd provided and the assessments, that was fine. I did get asked for someone else to provide information (like a sibling or friend) in addition to my mum, but I didn't want to make my sister anxious by having her do it (it was worrying her that she couldn't be helpful and she's quite an anxious person) and felt too weird asking one of my friends, so I didn't and that didn't really have any impact.
Thanks, that's reassuring. When I saw the size of the questionnaires I panicked a bit as assumed it meant they required a lot of detail. I'll try asking a friend as well to complete the other one as probably would be a bit easier.