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How not to irritate your loved ones with special interests

Fraiselongue

I haven't been on here much as

a) the site has been very slow to load and

b) I just got a new special interest, which feels very much like an addiction for me at first.

I'm just wondering how other people manage when they're in the initial throes of a new obsession and only want to talk about that obsession, but their family/friends have zero interest in it?

I'm very aware that my poor husband has to put up with this quite often and he gets quite p'd off with me constantly quoting things or trying to share videos that to me are the most interesting things in the world but to him hold no interest.

It's not even like you can share your excitement with other autistic people as the likelihood is that they won't share your interest either and we're generally even worse at feigning interest.

So do most people just keep it to themselves? Wait until it's less intense? Or do you seek out online communities?

My current special interest is a musician who is very famous so there are lots of pubescent girls posting hundreds of photos but it's not a sexual thing at all for me and I wouldn't want to chat with a load of teenagers. Years ago there were lots of fan forums for most TV shows and bands but they all seem to have vanished.

I'm rambling but I'd be interested to hear others' experiences and feelings on this.

Thank you.

Parents

  • Do your interests come and go quickly, or do they last for a while? Mine differ, but short-term ones hit me hard and go as quickly as they hit me. These interests I find hard to contain as I want to absorb it rapidly and that means talking about it as well. I am getting better at this though and will often take time out alone to focus on it and not disturb others around me. Longterm ones are easier to manage and I don't feel as compelled to share them unless people ask me questions on the subjects or are curious.

  • in reply to Starbuck

    Since the internet came along the short term ones are insanely intense. Whereas before I might just listen to the same music over and over, read articles in magazines, and before social media I would join a forum, exchange bootleg tapes etc, now everything is available immediately. I can drop my daughter at school and it will be time to pick up and all I've done is watch interviews all day. 

    Then when I've watched/read/listened to everything available it's like a bereavement or going cold turkey (not that I've ever taken drugs... would definitely get addicted!).

    I suspect that if I didn't have the internet, I would have fewer of these intense short term interests. Having said that I LOVE it during that first week. It's the same emotions as falling in love for me.

    I just wish I could keep my mouth shut about it. Smile

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  • in reply to Starbuck

    Since the internet came along the short term ones are insanely intense. Whereas before I might just listen to the same music over and over, read articles in magazines, and before social media I would join a forum, exchange bootleg tapes etc, now everything is available immediately. I can drop my daughter at school and it will be time to pick up and all I've done is watch interviews all day. 

    Then when I've watched/read/listened to everything available it's like a bereavement or going cold turkey (not that I've ever taken drugs... would definitely get addicted!).

    I suspect that if I didn't have the internet, I would have fewer of these intense short term interests. Having said that I LOVE it during that first week. It's the same emotions as falling in love for me.

    I just wish I could keep my mouth shut about it. Smile

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