Boyfriend has just been diagnosed with autism (age 19)

We have been together nearly 3 years and my boyfriend has dyspraxia and dyslexia, recently he received his confirmation that he is also autistic. We are starting our second year at uni in September and we live together so I am with him 90% of the time. I wondered what help is accessible, I have read about PIP, but I didn't know whether I would be acceptable as a carer (I feel like it would be something I needed to justify as he means a lot to me and 'carer' makes it sound like a job). Any information would be appreciated as I really don't know what I can do to make his life that little bit easier.  

  • I didn't really think about this thank you. My boyfriend has tinted glasses and has to wear them to reduce the light (his are red), I suggested he applied for DSA and he was rewarded lots of software to help, as have I.

  • BTW like many women I was mis-diagnosed with MH issues before autism, therefore, my first PIP claim was for MH. If you feel you meet the criteria and have enough evidence to back it up (such as a print out of your GP notes) you could apply too.

  • I was awarded the enhanced rate the first time I applied and again at renewal. I felt I was successful as I approached it like an academic essay - making my point then providing evidence. For example,

    Reading and understanding symbols and words

    Black text on a white background buzzes, causing me rapid fatigue when reading. As such, I can not read without an aid, as page xxx of the Needs Assessment states, this is the screen tinting software Claro Read. I also wear green-tinted glasses when needed, including reading handouts in lectures (see xxx for evidence of this). Furthermore, as page xx of the needs assessment states, I am unable to spot my own errors when reading back written work and instead use text-to-speech software to read aloud my work as I find I am able to spot more errors this way.

  • Hello it is not unusual for claims to be refused upon first application!  It might help you both if maybe you see how your boyfriend gets on a daily basis ! Then after say 2 to 3 months if you have a better idea on how he his autism impacts him along with his dyspraxia and dyslexia, you could then consider re-applying but do so through someone at your local Citizens Advice Service !  Good luck! 

    Oh does your boyfriend get support at Uni ?  It could be a discussion you both could have with the students union and if they can offer some support (that would be something that a Citizens Advice worker could explain in a future claim form !

  • Thank you, he is happy for me to help him with his PIP claim, strangely he isn't worried about how it affects him, hes still the same person he has always been so he doesn't see anything change. I have trouble with my mental health and so this is also why Im a little conscious about it, I think hes proud to have me as his 'carer'. His sister is highly autistic but was diagnosed when she was young and so I confident about the eligibility of things! 

    thank you so much for your comment, I just didn't want it to become an obstacle in our relationship.

  • PIP is dependant on how your boyfriend's label effect him across as a certain number of descriptors (see link below). If he meets enough points across these board he'd be awarded either standard or enhanced rate. As a university student, he's likely to have lots of relevant evidence to send off with his application increasing his chances of sucess. This could include his a needs assessment for the Disabled Students Allowances (if he applied), as well as his diagnostic report for autism.

    https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/Global/Migrated_Documents/adviceguide/pip-9-table-of-activities-descriptors-and-points.pdf

    http://www.awp.nhs.uk/media/825665/guide-to-pip-20-april-2017.pdf

    I like how your already cautious about the impact of having to be his 'carer' may have. If you don't need the income I'd think long and hard about this might impact his self-esteem and self-image. As someone whose autistic, dyslexia and ADHD, I'm very much aware that there's nothing I'm unable to do and its mainstream society that put barriers in place to disable me. I see your boyfriend in the same boat and that he's not disabled, although society disabled him. Hopefully that makes sense

    If he is successfully awarded PIP this would make him eligible for bogof tickets for many things, such as the cinema through a CEA card, theatre tickets.