Hello everyone. I am 52 and last month it was confirmed that i am Aspergers.
For most of my life i have struggled with stress and depression and a thinking that perhaps my sanity was severely compromised. Now i have an explanation and growing understanding of how i function. I cannot express the relief to know i am not crazy.
However i am struggling to adjust and adapt my mindset. I was convinced that i was just mad and needed medicating and now know this not to be the case. But i keep finding myself in denial that this is real and i am Asperger. Then i read the 19 page report on me and go "oh yeah, i recognise all of that. that's me!" This is a life changing diagnosis and means i can re-evaluate my past and gain an understanding of the many whys and hopefully grow to greatly love this so called disability which does have a good side. Now i know why i can listen to a song 30 times and each playing feels as fresh as the first, same with movies, same with books. And i spend dawn to dusk on my art, a talent born out of this condition.
But (ah always a but) I want to cry! I feel alone and very strange. I look in a mirror and now a stranger looks back at me...i even asked of that face "who are you?" I see a frightened and lost rabbit staring back.
I live in Scarborough, North Yorkshire and have been to doctors. I need counselling from a special autism psychologist and there are none in this region who deal with adults. I have searched for support and again there is nothing here except a group supporting parents and carers of children. All local services are geared toward children. I am high functioning and live on my own. I cook, am debt free and know very few people as friends. I have no local family.
Does anyone know of any groups that support adults in this region? Perhaps there are a few of you who might like to meet up for a coffee if only to share stories and tell this very frightened and confused adult male that all shall be well.
I hope this is not an inappropriate post or topic but this is me today. Alone and struggling.
