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Adult Diagnosis at 52

Stonewood

Hello everyone. I am 52 and last month it was confirmed that i am Aspergers.

For most of my life i have struggled with stress and depression and a thinking that perhaps my sanity was severely compromised. Now i have an explanation and growing understanding of how i function. I cannot express the relief to know i am not crazy.

However i am struggling to adjust and adapt my mindset. I was convinced that i was just mad and needed medicating and now know this not to be the case. But i keep finding myself in denial that this is real and i am Asperger. Then i read the 19 page report on me and go "oh yeah, i recognise all of that. that's me!" This is a life changing diagnosis and means i can re-evaluate my past and gain an understanding of the many whys and hopefully grow to greatly love this so called disability which does have a good side. Now i know why i can listen to a song 30 times and each playing feels as fresh as the first, same with movies, same with books. And i spend dawn to dusk on my art, a talent born out of this condition.

But (ah always a but) I want to cry! I feel alone and very strange. I look in a mirror and now a stranger looks back at me...i even asked of that face "who are you?" I see a frightened and lost rabbit staring back.

I live in Scarborough, North Yorkshire and have been to doctors. I need counselling from a special autism psychologist and there are none in this region who deal with adults. I have searched for support and again there is nothing here except a group supporting parents and carers of children. All local services are geared toward children. I am high functioning and live on my own. I cook, am debt free and know very few people as friends. I have no local family.

Does anyone know of any groups that support adults in this region? Perhaps there are a few of you who might like to meet up for a coffee if only to share stories and tell this very frightened and confused adult male that all shall be well. 

I hope this is not an inappropriate post or topic but this is me today. Alone and struggling.

  • hi i was diagnosed at 63 im so glad iv finally found out i I am m no nuts its everyone else the problem is im living in there world thats what makes me nuts i researched it crazily for none  stop 1yr  know i feel great proud to be on the spectrum we are honest loyal  kind and so  many other good stuff  i know feel empowered rather than wondering whats going on  theirs a lot on the net for free you can even get books from the library  and y tube have a few good videos  i exhausted the free bees first before paying out cash  all the best 

  • I was diagnosed last year at 46. There is no adult post diagnosis support in my area, and the only NAS group is aimed at children/parents. I find this forum very useful to chat/ read about what other people are experiencing.

  • Hi, I was diagnosed in May and I am 49. Like you I am trying to work through the feelings post-diagnosis. Someone on this forum recommended reading  Very Late Diagnosis of Asperger Syndrome (Autism Spectrum Disorder): How seeking a Diagnosis in Adulthood Can Change Your LIfe by Philip Wylie. I have found this book very helpful as it has been written by someone who has gone through what we are.

    Also, though it is an American site, www.aspergersexperts.com has a lot of good information on approaching coping strategies.

    Hope this helps :)

  • Hi - I was diagnosed at 42 - I spent the time afterwards retracing all of my previous life and analysing all of the interactions with people trying to work out who were friend or foe.   I realised just how vulnerable and different to everyone else I really was and it gave me the reason why I work one way and everyone else do things in such a chaotic way.

    Take some time to process yourself and decide which bits of you are good and bad.

    I joined Mettup.com to get out and about for gentle social interaction with little commitment.    I attend coffee mornings, lunches, cinema, pub quizzes etc.

    I've also realised that all of my close friends are probably undiagnosed aspies too - they are so much more interesting than NTs - we have so many shared interests & hobbies.