Published on 12, July, 2020
No kidding.
On my 48th birthday, I was diagnosed with Asperger's. What a waste. If I had known that years ago, perhaps things could have been in place to do something. However, far from an angelic shout and great awakening, I work anti-social hours washing dishes. What's the point? I've always been into creativity, as I can't socialise or play sports etc, and hit high grades in Uni and paint and draw and now want to get n acoustic guitar and learn how to read music as this seems more important than just slogging away for basic rate and paying bills, and one night a week down the pub and a pizza delivered for a weekend treat. However, I am single with no kids and going nowhere. My art is not good enough to take over the world - my Asperger's seems to give me the dream whilst taking away it's ability at the same time. I cry at any celebrations as I cannot join in, from weddings to live music. It seems childish to say it's not fair, but - it's not fair.
And it's also pointless to try, as it's always failure as an outcome.
The weight and emptiness of the future is too much.
So- what's the point? If you've been forced into a game that you were going to lose in the first place, what's the point in carrying on?
Hi, I was diagnosed with Asperger's last December, a couple of weeks before my 38th Birthday. I have on occasion felt regret that I wasn't diagnosed as a child, although on reflection I'm at a better life stage and in a better head space to be able to deal with it now. I have had the odd 'blip' since diagnosis where my anxiety levels have mushroomed, but they tend to be short lived. Having Asperger's does not mean losing at anything. In fact for me it simply pointed out where I had been going wrong my whole life so I changed track in response to that.
Learning the acoustic guitar seems like a good idea. I've tried before but it's not for me!
Can I suggest that you speak with your GP about how you are feeling post diagnosis and ask them to refer you to your local autism services, hopefully they will be able to assist you. It might also be worth finding out if their are any local Asperger's or Autism social clubs that you could attend to meet other people with the same condition?