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Removing 'the mask'

NAS62726

As a female currently trying to cope with life I am wondering how others cope with their 'masking' of symptoms.

For me, I have found I immediately fake a smile and make an effort to have interesting conversation and must stay alert during conversation inorder to present as normal. I have found particular problems with work. I can easily get a job. I am good at interviews and can keep my performance going for upto a month on average but then I will slowly or suddenly start to decline. I miss deadlines, I feel exhausted, stressed, disorganised, unmotivated and my work performance just gets worse. I have never lasted more than 7 months in a job.

What does 'masking' look like to you? 

Parents

  • For me the need to mask seems to be proportional to my anxiety levels, especially in the workplace.  I feel that quite often the job description, person spec, office or organisational culture almost requires me to mask as the stereotypical "person for the job" probably doesn't ressemble me.  If i mask, i'm more likely to ge tthe job.  Then the problems start.  Demands increase and my anxieties about my ability to meet them also increase.  It feels for all the world like walking the plank.  The longer I continue, the further out I get and the more wobbly i feel.  Not good, as I know from experience where this leads.

    Things that have helped.   Finding a niche, checking out the organisational culture in advance, moving to part time working, working from home, becoming self employed, finding more safe spaces in which i can be genuinely myself, judicious use of sick leave and holiday entitlements, not going for that next promotion even where it's expected, pacing myself, sticking with therapies and down time activities that help (especially gardening, for me the ultimate solitary pursuit).  Oh, getting older seems to have helped too, taking place in the background while i was doing all those other things.    

  • in reply to Jenny Butterfly
    Jenny Butterfly said:
    Things that have helped.   Finding a niche, checking out the organisational culture in advance, moving to part time working, working from home, becoming self employed, finding more safe spaces in which i can be genuinely myself, judicious use of sick leave and holiday entitlements, not going for that next promotion even where it's expected, pacing myself, sticking with therapies and down time activities that help (especially gardening, for me the ultimate solitary pursuit).  Oh, getting older seems to have helped too, taking place in the background while i was doing all those other things

    I could have written this. Just swap ham radio / electronics for gardening :-)

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  • in reply to Jenny Butterfly
    Jenny Butterfly said:
    Things that have helped.   Finding a niche, checking out the organisational culture in advance, moving to part time working, working from home, becoming self employed, finding more safe spaces in which i can be genuinely myself, judicious use of sick leave and holiday entitlements, not going for that next promotion even where it's expected, pacing myself, sticking with therapies and down time activities that help (especially gardening, for me the ultimate solitary pursuit).  Oh, getting older seems to have helped too, taking place in the background while i was doing all those other things

    I could have written this. Just swap ham radio / electronics for gardening :-)

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