I'm still digging around trying to understand what sorts of things are counted as meeting threshold for RRBs / IS in an autism diagnosis. Please note that I don't intend to fake any at my upcoming ADOS! What I'm after is some examples that allow me to settle the question in my mind that wonders if my clinical interview missed RRBs / IS that I *do* have, but aren't the stereotypical "obvious" ones.
I don't want a positive diagnosis if I'm not genuinely ASD, but neither do I want a negative diagnosis if I *am*.
Apart from the minor success I've had in discovering the RBQ2a, I'm drawing a blank in my internet based research.
I don't know if this contribution fits here but here goes...
One of the traits for autism is struggling with changes in routine. So whenever I have read about it, I have always just assumed this means daily routine. I've actually never had my morning routine disrupted and thought this trait couldn't apply to me.
A while ago i saw on a ch4 documentary that for some people it's not specifically routine but change with expected events. (So I'm not sure if this is to do with rigid thinking or routines, maybe they overlap).
I've had incredible anxiety today. It's an ongoing thing I'm trying to manage. I've been off work with it and been on reduced hours. Today was my first full day back in.
1. I attended a training event this morning. My brain knew there was nothing to be concerned about. I wouldn't be put in the spot. It was very informal. But couldn't shake off that anxiety.
2. Training finished earlier than expected so I returned to my usual job earlier than expected. I managed well. My brain knew I'd coped well and nothing bad had happened. Still the anxiety grew.
3. I found some paperwork which hadn't been completed by my cover when I was off a few weeks ago which meant I now had to do it. I thought it wouldve been done tbh and was a bit cheesed off that I now had to put the time in to catch up. (Given id been off with anxiety some of it due to workload). My brain was saying "it's no problem these things happen" but the anxiety got worse.
On my drive home I really tried to get to the root of why this had all made me anxious. The humsn brain me knew the rational explanations but the animal me just felt anxious. I felt more at ease when I identified "I think it's because I'd experienced 3 unexpected events in quick succession".
Does this all relate to routine or am i barking up the wrong tree? It's quite clear these unexpected events have caused me problems. Is my response excessive or normal?
I think what I'm trying to say is, I feel it wasn't the events themselves which caused the anxiety, but the rigidity of my thinking and that what actually happened didnt match with what i thought was going to happen in my mind.
I've had this before when people have just turned up at the house out of the blue.
I'm going to speak with my counsellor about how I can build more flexibility into my thought patterns.
I totally can't handle expected things not happening or things happening unexpectedly. My reaction can vary from just feeling a bit thrown to full on losing the plot over it, luckily the latter of the two only happens very rarely. The reaction is definitely caused by rigidity of thinking patterns and a need for predictability, our brains simply can't move on and adjust to changes that quickly.