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Too much at the moment

mouse2

I feel everything's too much again!

As I've said before I'm not diagnosed formally.

I had I think a meltdown today :( everything's too much at the moment, I want life to stop or slow down. I'm struggling to think properly. Anxious thoughts are drowning me.

I like to know what I'm doing, what's going on, everything seems jumbled and uncertain.

Yesterday an elderly man came upto me on my allotment (my happy place I needed as I was feeling overwhelmed) I've always smiled and spoken politely. He stood by me and said hi I said hi. He then commented I should cut my raspberry canes back I said at the end of the year as they are done after the season. He then added they look messy. (I've taken on a messy not looked after plot and it needs alot of work) I walked off but he remained. Another plot holder came over and the old guy said that the other man had dumped the soil etc from his drive into my raised beds! (I've been removing the soil as it's so polluted) why did this old man feel the need to tell me that? I know I need to get rid of the soil but why tell me it's from this other man? He then stood there smiling! I just went home and cried. 

I wasent sure if i spotted a small bit of asbestos or If it was concrete so someone said whys he dump it on your plot not his now I'm worrying all the more.

I dont know if I'm overthinking I just feel it's all too much to deal with. 

That's just one of many run ins lately with people. I'm minding my own business and someone does something on purpose to hurt me and I cant work out why. I'm nice to everyone, will help anyone out.

I pretty much hate people 

Parents

  • The message I believe was kind, maybe the method was too intense at the time and lacking mindfulness. 

    You may feel you hate people but you are of worth and feeling super super hypersensitive right now. Try to practice self care and you are already at doing such by reaching out here.

    Other people can be overwhelming and it takes us time to work out what they are saying, how they are saying (i.e. is it kind or malicious) and to process it all

    Keep being YOU

    x

  • in reply to .

    I'm also feeling stressed as a neighbour smokes weed another neighbour told me. It makes me panicky. My husband says I see stuff too black and white, stuffs either good or bad. Now when i smell smoke i shut our windows and its boiling hot at the moment :( 

  • in reply to mouse2

    Does your husband understand that you are anxious about this though? I hope he is able to reassure you x

  • in reply to .

    I popped to the allotment as it's my calm place usually. Thinking after 8pm I'll be alone....caught someone flytipping my allotment! So had to confront them as politely as I could and asked they removed it again. They live next to the allotments so i tried to keep it polite. :( then came home again anxious a out what else they may do.

    Thank you for your help today I'm now heading to bed. Have a good night

  • in reply to mouse2
    mouse2 said:
    I then get angry at myself for not realising what people are like

    People are indeed puzzles. The key thing is to know how to keep yourself self and to learn scripts to politely deal with them and return to your own bubble or safe place.

Reply Children
  • in reply to .

    I popped to the allotment as it's my calm place usually. Thinking after 8pm I'll be alone....caught someone flytipping my allotment! So had to confront them as politely as I could and asked they removed it again. They live next to the allotments so i tried to keep it polite. :( then came home again anxious a out what else they may do.

    Thank you for your help today I'm now heading to bed. Have a good night