Is autism hereditary?

Both of my parents are neurotypical and nobody in close family has any kind of mental disability so nobody gets me and I don’t get them either. It’s difficult when interacting with them because my views can be seen as extreme or irrelevant due to who I am.

This may be why my best friend has bipolar and Aspergers, I don’t know whether being autistic is good or bad. It is often passed down but can also just occur out of the blue. 

Sometimes i think I am unwanted by my family just because i am special and have certain needs. It’s difficult to explain to them because I’m smarter than most of them but I can’t talk to people very well.

Life is just so confusing.

Now I have started my journey, discussing with distant relations as well as some sayings I was told by my parents then it is definitely hereditary from both parents sides of my ancestry.  I have the paternal hand movements (stimming) and stubbornness/fixations too.  I also think my maternal side from a too trusting/gullibility perspective also.

In my personal experience, yes!

I would say that both my parents have it, I wonder about my sister and wonder if she has just managed to appear normal as girls do. My parents ended up divorcing amid a lot of rows which at the time appeared to be my mothers cause but I think the blame is mutual. they have just got back together again but living seperately and with no more family interfearance.

Very sound advice.   Despite my negativity regarding my son's diagnosis he is actually embracing it and receiving help from his Uni (he is studying physics) and is prepared to accept help so that is good news.   However,  my daughter although accepting of the fact she has ASD, refuses any help of any kind from anyone.   I think this is partly a result of the traumatic experience she has had of being a CAMHS inpatient for 2.5 years as a result of her eating disorder.   Her perception of people trying to help her is associated with being made to do things she didn't want to do (including restraint unfortunately) and because her thought patterns are so rigid she cannot believe that someone trying to help her will end well!  Still,  there is light at the end of the tunnel possibly as she was discharged last week and is studying Wildlife Conservation.   You're right about acceptance though.   Until she fully embraces her differences her self esteem will remain very poor.  Her self esteem is so bad and i think this led to her eating disorder.   She accepts she has ASC but she says there is nothing that can be done about it that's just the way she is.   However,  what she hasn't accepted yet,  and as you alluded to,  is that there is nothing wrong with the way she is.   She is very intelligent,  a fantastic pianist and a very caring individual but she cannot see any of this. 

For me, being able to say to people "I have ASD/Asperger's Syndrome and this means.... <insert explanation of why I may do/have done something odd/that caused upset etc.> " has taken a ton of stress off me and has actually reduced the frequency of 'incidents'.

I think it's important to have a 'mentor' if you're struggling with the diagnosis - this could help your daughter and also (if he went that route) your son - seeing a positive role model for what ASD looks like 'In real life' vs. the (overwhelmingly negative) list of diagnostic traits and (naively ill-informed) portrayals of aspies/auties in popular media could help them understand the areas that having ASD means they can excel in.

I'm a Business Analyst in IT - I am brilliant at it and I think I would be a shadow of myself in this area if I didn't have ASD.

There are a lot of engineering types here.

Self-acceptance is key to happiness, using precious energy trying to 'mask' is ultimately futile and will only lead to low self-esteem when one constantly fails to 'pass' as NT

Given the patterns within my family over a number of generations, i'd be very surprised to find it wasn't.  I also now believe that this is what drew me to my husband as I think we're both neurodivergent.  Consequently (i think) so are our sons.   

As Philip Wylie states, again in the "Very Late Diagnosis" book, "Be aware that there is a very powerful law of attraction between similar people who have neurological conditions" and also that, "the popular idiom "birds of a feather flock together" is relevent to people who have ASD".  He also refers to the "path of autism" in families and recommends that the pathway should be investigated on a family basis rather than individually (not that this happens, but I think he's onto something).

Following my own very late diagnosis last year, i can now easily join the dots and track this path within my own family.  In fact, i can't believe I didn't see it a great deal sooner, even if the issues that tended to crop up did attract different labels over the years (usually depression or anxiety).  What i now see is that undiagnosed (and therefore unsupported) autism was the ground on which these other issues grew.  

That said, i used to think we all just shared family traits and that this was our normal.  Yes, we tend to be a bit eccentric and sensitive, but so what?  So in many ways it's been easy for autism to hide in plain sight for so long.    

Thank you for your replies.  I thought as much.  I also had an uncle who was diagnosed with schizophrenia back in the 1940's but there wasn't a diagnosis of autism in the 40's and having known him until he died when I was 43 I can say quite confidently that he had many ASD traits and struggled to talk to people.  My cousin's grandson is severely impacted.

I don't intend to seek a diagnosis though because I have lived with myself quite happily for 54 years and have at this age accepted the things that old me back are not due to a lack of ability but a lack of/inability to put myself through a ridiculous amount of stress.  In short I have been very lucky and am happy with myself now.   I just wish I could pass this on to my lovely daughter who is still struggling massively.  I also wish my son hadn't sought a diagnosis because it came in his second year at Uni and he now thinks he can't succeed in his chosen field of study because ASD will hold him back.   I also think my husband has secretly decided that he has ASD but he also doesn't want to go through assessment.   We both work in an Engineering R&D environment and I have read that there is a higher than average proportion of people with ASD work as Engineers and in R&D.

Everything (science-based) I've read since starting my journey to diagnosis says 'Yes, ASD is genetic'.

Apparently it's even possible to do a brain scan to confirm ASD.

"Moreover, research at the King’s College Institute of Psychiatry has revealed that a 15-minute magnetic resonance imaging brain scan can identify ASD with 90 per cent accuracy (Wellyn 2012)"

Wylie, Philip. Very Late Diagnosis of Asperger Syndrome (Autism Spectrum Disorder): How Seeking a Diagnosis in Adulthood Can Change Your Life (p. 66). Jessica Kingsley Publishers. Kindle Edition.

It is VERY common for adults to get diagnosed with ASD late in life following getting a diagnosis for one or more of their children.

When going through my own assessment my parents kept saying "We didn't spot anything odd..." and yeah, I can definitely see traits in my parents and grandparents now I know what I'm looking for...

I would say it is incredibly likely. Just my opinion there I'm in no way a professional 

Autism is thought to be genetic but not necessarily directly inherited. It is also possible for autistic parents to have neurotypical children.