• Replies 49 replies
  • Subscribers 91 subscribers
  • Views 22563 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Why do people think it's OK to be autistic?

Sickle Moon

I don't feel accepted and supported, I just feel defective, judged by everyone, and guilty for what I've done to my family. I know we're all entitled to our opinions and feelings, and that we all think differently, but I just really don't understand why some autistic people 'celebrate' it and think it's OK to be autistic when I honestly don't think there is anything less OK in the entire world, particularly when you're a woman and it's such a man's condition. I often feel my strong sense of identity as a female is being stolen from me.

Parents

  • Thank you all for all your replies. The question of me becoming a mother is a difficult one - it's a conversation for another day really but I take all of your points. The last thing I would ever want is for my child to be hurt or damaged emotionally, so I know I've got to be careful. The men I sleep with are a different story - most of them aren't respectful of me, they're rough with me and they hurt me, and they just take what they want and leave, so I feel angry towards them, to be honest. It's hard to imagine them wanting to know their child - they don't seem to have a caring bone in their body. I know feelings go deeper than this, but they don't seem to have much regard for how I feel, so...it's all very complicated.

    It's annoying because I know all the things about women presenting differently and therefore being more difficult to diagnose, but I still think of it as a man's condition and I feel the diagnosis is an assault on my femininity. I can't seem to change the way I feel. Sometimes I get even more triggered by the idea of the different female presentation - like, I know there's a special separate test for females they suspect are on the spectrum, but with me, they used a standard test, which is probably one they used for boys. I just break all over again when I think about that.

  • in reply to Sickle Moon

    You are right, women can present very differently to men and until recently that was not recognised at at women were dismissed and misdiagnosed as the testing was designed around males. It is only now that it is starting to become known that women can be very different in presentation but there is still no male/ female test I know the university of Kent is developing one but at the moment it is still just a standard one that is open for interpretation by the professional performing it. 

    This should take nothing away from your femininity my daughter is very girly and she is awaiting assessment, however my other daughter is the world's biggest tomboy and neurotypical so it is really down to what you believe about yourself, I'm not autistic but I'm certainly not what you would define as feminine! I am a woman but the unrealistic portrayal of femininity is beyond me I'm a bit more practical about things.

Reply
  • in reply to Sickle Moon

    You are right, women can present very differently to men and until recently that was not recognised at at women were dismissed and misdiagnosed as the testing was designed around males. It is only now that it is starting to become known that women can be very different in presentation but there is still no male/ female test I know the university of Kent is developing one but at the moment it is still just a standard one that is open for interpretation by the professional performing it. 

    This should take nothing away from your femininity my daughter is very girly and she is awaiting assessment, however my other daughter is the world's biggest tomboy and neurotypical so it is really down to what you believe about yourself, I'm not autistic but I'm certainly not what you would define as feminine! I am a woman but the unrealistic portrayal of femininity is beyond me I'm a bit more practical about things.

Children
No Data