I went out for a walk and had a big panic attack. I came home and called up two helplines and the people on them didn't understand why I feel so bad, so I felt as usual like I am all on my own.
I went out for a walk and had a big panic attack. I came home and called up two helplines and the people on them didn't understand why I feel so bad, so I felt as usual like I am all on my own.
Nobody here has wronged me... but I feel quite sad that over all 32 years of my life, every single professional, psychologists, psychiatrists, social workers, support workers, has made judgements on me that are failing to see the big picture. They think they know me, they think they know me better than myself. I get a bad service then I get kicked out to the curb. It's kind of hard being alone.
Writing this here is entirely reasonable and understandable. I don't want to give you platitudes so I will just say that I hope that you can feel better soon & I hope and believe that others here will also be along to try to help.
I hate myself for writing this here. I don't like being the bearer of bad news. I don't like being a burden on people. I hate myself. I hate being lonely. I wouldn't wish my life on anybody.
I don't know if I'm okay. I feel worse than usual at the moment. Tomorrow morning I will feel better than I do now. But maybe this feeling will come back as it often has. It's difficult to say. I feel very lonely. You can distract yourself for so long.
Oh that sucks. When the place you think you can go for support doesn't deliver. You're home now though, are you feeling over the panic attack? Are you otherwise OK?
