Hello everyone,
I have been absent from the forums for some time. I tend to flit in and out like that.
I was already struggling before I was officially diagnosed with Aspergers. I suffered several traumatic events up till the age of twenty at the hands of my mum and her various partners. I have talked and talked about it with therapists and doctors and a psychologist.
I don't know whether it's to do with my traumatic experiences or if it is related to my Aspergers but I find being around other people very hard. It could be a mixture of both. I find that I'm uncomfortable and anxious and never know what to say. I get scared that I will offend or upset people, so I tend to stay quiet.
I get so frustrated with myself because I would love to work. I started a volunteering job two years ago but had to take a break last June because I was diagnosed with Remitting Relapsing MS and I'm scared to go back.
I have low-level support from a charity that specialises in Autism. I was referred to them last year from Secondary Care. I was offered a support worker but it turned out he was only available to talk me through what having Autism means and about the different ways people communicate and why we need to do so.
I shared my feelings with the lady who works for the charity about maybe doing a part-time course and she said I should pick one thing to focus on and then try volunteering once my confidence is where it should be. I feel very frustrated because it is not the first time she has suggested taking things slowly but never offers a pathway forward.
If I go any slower I'll come to a complete standstill.
I just want to have friends and a job like everybody else. :(
Thanks for reading,
Katie
