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My partner shows no affection towards me

Rottie girl

Ive been with my partner for 3 years. Slowly  he has distanced himself from me affectionately. He no longer cuddles kisses or puts his arms around me.  Sexual encounters he shows no love or emotion just the need to do it. He has been diagnosed aspergers  so how he is all falls into place.  I support him but i get nothing back in return. I love him but  i feel more his carer than his partner so my feelings for him are changing as he is so distant. I dont want to end the relationship.  Do i continue as we are knowing it is how the condition affects him and accept the feeling of no love towards me? 

Parents

  • Sorry to hear about your situation. I nearly split up with my partner of 16 years over similar issues. We went to relationship counselling and it has really helped us. My personal experience as a person with autism is that I like receiving affection from my partner some of the time, but I rarely give it. I find it quite difficult to do and it doesn't feel like a need for me. So, as others have said, it would be good to talk about this more with your partner and possibly seek professional guidance. Relationship therapy was amazing in my experience and it has helped me and my partner to accept each other a lot more. Good luck whatever you do. 

  • in reply to Andrew

    Thank you for your reply. We do talk openly so not sure we need councilling.  Its more learning to meet each others needs or me understanding his lack of and living with it

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  • in reply to Andrew

    Thank you for your reply. We do talk openly so not sure we need councilling.  Its more learning to meet each others needs or me understanding his lack of and living with it

Children
  • in reply to Beany

    Hello Beany, I just saw this forum and your post, searching for help. I hve been experiencing the same thing for years as well. myboyfriend was very interested in sexual contact in the beginning (we do not live together) and now he just wants to go out to eator see a movie, then we just say good bye, and he's fine with it. When I tell him I am lonely, he says he is working on things, and searching for the information he needs. It's like I am a fiend now?

  • in reply to Rottie girl

    Hi. Was wondering how things panned out for you.? I deeply sympathise. My male partner is on the autistic scale with severe ocd.  11 years of no affection. Just made the decision  to finish the relationship . it's broken my heart as I know he loves me. We talk endlessly to no avail. Jill. Worried