Was this women flirting?

There's one professional woman I see for help and at the last meeting she said she liked my hat, that it added mystery to my appearance, and complimented my coat and asked where I got it from. There was another time we were on the phone and she mentioned how I wasn't doing so well lately but at the end of last year I had a spring in my step and said that I was looking good too. Also every time we have met she at some point during the meeting starts curling her hair around while we're talking.

Would you say she was flirting?

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  • You're like me in that I don't recognise the signs.  I've missed a lot of opportunities in the past.

    Do you think you might respond?  When you say she's a professional you see for help, do you mean like a therapist?  I only ask because there would obviously be an issue with boundaries.

  • She's a mental health nurse so yeah I think there would be boundaries. Just wondered why she's doing it really, if she is flirting.

  • Hm.  Looking back on it, my therapist was quite flirtatious.  Her clothing, too, was sometimes not what I'd consider professionally appropriate.  Distracting, you might say.  I hope that doesn't make me sound sexist.  I wonder now if part of it might have been that she knew there could not be anything between us.  Maybe she enjoyed that dynamic.  Who knows?

    Does it make you feel uncomfortable in her presence?  It's really odd, but if I've got the hots for someone, I try to avoid being around them too much.  You'd think it would be the other way around.  But I'm just afraid of it being too obvious, and I'd end up a fumbling wreck.

  • I think all that sort of thing is a lot more mainstream these days.  If she's relaxed about it then it's not her that's having the problem.  It's only flesh at the end of the day.

  • Erm, well... I wasn't the only client to comment on it.  Plunging and revealing necklines, for instance.  Nothing wrong with that at all.  But in the context of a therapy session?

  • I wonder if it could be a generation thing, that for her generation her clothing is not considered inappropriate but for someone of your generation it could be?  I've come across a few things about young female clothing which I've eventually decided were just a generational thing.

  • The difficult thing about these situations is, the people involved may not find people as compatible with them, outside that professional setting.

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