Published on 12, July, 2020
apologies in advance for ranting!
Does anyone else on here have a spouse/partner who, whenever you have an opinion that differs to theirs, they feel the need to blame the difference of opinion on your neurological condition (I say neurological as I’m ASD + ABI). I get this frequently with my husband. The latest example being about 20 minutes ago. Basically I’d spent a good few hours sorting through all the children’s toys in the lounge. What they are currently playing with and what hasn’t been touched since Christmas and put all the older toys in a large box upstairs ready to go in the loft later. So while I was busy decluttering elsewhere in the house my husband goes and gets the box and tips the contents over the floor in the lounge claiming the children still play with them ( they don’t). I got annoyed, not losing it annoyed but just like ‘what do you think you’re doing I’ve just spent hours sorting those toys out’. Instead of any apology my husband just blames my annoyance on me being rigid and fixed and inflexible (prior to ASD diagnosis the same used to get blamed on the ABI) due to Aspergers. Like I’m not allowed to just have a different opinion to him, I’m not allowed to have my own mind. Any opinion I have that differs from his has to be due to my neurological stuff! This annoys me so much, yes I can be very fixed BUT I know when I’m being fixed or when I just happen to have a different opinion to someone else and to be honest I’m pretty sure that most neurotypical women would have got annoyed in the same situation just because it was an annoying and disrespectful thing to do!!
rant over
Yes you have every right to get annoyed with this! And your right a neurotypical woman would have been angry to I personally would have blown a gasket over it! I find my other half does things like this when he has had a bad day and is trying to pick a fight so he can vent and get things of his chest same as he would have a go about my physical problems making me useless at keeping the house clean, but I stopped taking the bait. I ignore him for a while then go and nicely ask him what is the matter generally I get an explanation and an apology! He just needs a while to get his head straight!