Published on 12, July, 2020
Wasn’t sure if to write here or not but I am hoping for some advice.
Whilst I was going through the diagnosis process i kept coming on here and have read over and over again how getting diagnosed has helped in some way and how others were worried they wouldn’t get diagnosed due to NHS not diagnosing in the area. I guess I am one of the lucky ones as I was diagnosed very quickly and this is why I feel so bad.
There seems to be so many people looking for a diagnosis and I have one and don’t serm to be happy. I have been trying to look at the positives but I feel very negative about the diagnosis and am struggling to cope. I am wanting to know if anybody else’s does or has felt the same.
i am sorry if my complaining is frustrating for those who are wanting a diagnosis I do realise I have been lucky
I was diagnosed at a very young age (I think I was about 5 years old?) so I don't even remember getting my diagnosis and obviously I wouldn't remember what it feels like to not have the diagnosis.
However I can completely understand what you mean. If I had only just discovered my diagnosis right now (I'm 25 btw) I think I would be in complete shock and would really struggle to come to terms with it.
Throughout most of my life I tried my hardest to hide my Aspergers from everyone, I was scared people would laugh at me and think I was a freak. I just wanted to be like everyone else. I would even deny I had it to everyone including doctors or counsellors who would try and bring it up! I hated being so different, I hated being me so much I wanted to die. I was ashamed of myself.
Over the past couple of years I've finally accepted the fact I have Aspergers, tbh I'm completely okay with it now. All of my behaviour, thought patterns, personality traits, etc all make sense to me.
I honestly believe it just takes some time.