Published on 12, July, 2020
Not sure how I am coping currently, I finding very hard to concentrate and do tasks.
I break down emotional every day feeling hopeless.
It feels as everyone hates me especially after my meltdowns especially at work (which I documented in the community forum a few weeks ago)
I just make the same mistakes over and over.
I have a loving wife and daughter, but my wife can't take much more, over the last two months we have talked about going our seperate ways.
I have alienated family, colleagues and neighbours, I don't have any friends.
I have tried various help, but I have no long term support for my disability including Mencap.
I was contacted by a Mencap worker a few weeks ago after establishing links through the NAS, but I had no support, not even spoken to them in person or by phone. I had a few emails but only to establish my current situation, now my emails are ignored.
I feel depressed and lonely, is it worth me continuing ? I f I go to the doctor I guess I will be put on tablets.
Please help!
Alphamale said:I feel depressed and lonely, is it worth me continuing ?
Yes. I think a few of us have been in that place. My mental health isn't at it's best at the moment, but it was worse a few years ago. I've made the same mistakes again, and again, but suicide is a mistake you only make once. I'd rather be alive to at least try to not make mistakes. I'm not critcizing you either, I've tried it, because I was so desparate. It failed, and that was a turning point. I woke up relieved it failed, ironically. It actually led me to diagnosis, and strategies to cope.
Alphamale said:I f I go to the doctor I guess I will be put on tablets.
You might be put into contact with a support network too. As for the tablets, it might be helpful for a while. See how they make YOU feel. Some people make assumptions about tablets, but they work for some people. It's what works for you, *** what other people think. If you are at your wits end they might work. See the doctor, be honest, and see what solutions are offered, you might be surprised.
I think you are taking the first step by admitting to yourself that you no longer want to feel the way you do. That's a big turning point.
Be kind to yourself, actually give yourself a pat on the back. You've been brave enough to admit you need change. A journey starts with one step, and you've just taken it.