Hating parties and social functions

Sunflower said:

I often used to be the designated driver at parties which meant becoming increasing appalled by other people's behaviour as I remained sober and they got drunker and drunker. It also meant trying to persuade them to go home late at night or in the early hours of the morning when they were not inclined to be reasonable.

I avoid parties like the plague but actually enjoy them when the others are getting completely pissed. It's the only time when they are honest and truthful. Their fake personality drops away and it becomes a huge truth-data gathering exercise. I can see the real person. Warts and all. People watching is one of my favourite hobbies.

I often used to be the designated driver at parties which meant becoming increasing appalled by other people's behaviour as I remained sober and they got drunker and drunker. It also meant trying to persuade them to go home late at night or in the early hours of the morning when they were not inclined to be reasonable.

One night I had to persuade a friend of my ex-partner not to drive himself home because he was far too drunk. My ex-partner actually had to take his car keys away from him. We started taking him home in our car but he kept forgetting the way. I eventually got him to his front door and when his wife opened it he said "it's alright. I'm perfectly fine" then he fell sideways into a rose bush. 

Weddings can be difficult too. All that standing around waiting for the photos to be taken, then the meal where you can end up sitting with people you don't get on with, or with people you don't know. The only weddings I really enjoyed were ones where my husband did wedding photography free, for couples who wanted to get married but couldn't afford to. Because I had a job to do helping my husband, and I wasn't there to socialise, it felt so much better. 

I hate parties they just seem a pointless waste of money and stress! Never been what you call social (not autistic just don't like crowds) to many people behaving unpredictably just sends me in to a panic 

I've done one once for a birthday 'surprise' (after I had a full scale anxiety attack on the way up there because I didn't know what I was doing, my mother agreed not to surprise me like that again). There's not a huge amount of teamwork involved if you're very good at puzzles.

It is a really long time ago since I last went to a party - probably over thirty years.

I simply refuse all invitations now.

They get me so worked-up I wouldn't know what to say and what to do.  When I have been to parties I just sit in a corner saying nothing and doing nothing.  I don't drink alcohol and I don't eat what anyone else is eating.  I would just have an orange juice and a packet of crisps.  I always had remarks such as 'you're being really quiet' which I was.  It is really outside my comfort zone altogether.

And this applies to other social occasions and being 'introduced' to someone for example at work.  I just completely freeze up, not knowing what to say.

And knowing how some people misbehave and over-indulge at parties, I'm glad I don't like them.  Most people I know have now got the message that I will refuse any invitation.

If they're such experts then presumably "The Aspie's Guide to Parties" is forthcoming?

Oh jeeez... have never been but from what I've heard that is teamwork 100%.

Many years ago I was told that the reason I don't like parties,  is that I don't really understand them.

My reaction was, of course I don't understand them!!!

Hahaha. I think anyone would hate parties you really don't want to go to

But seriously, I get very worked up if I have to go to a party. The period before it takes place is already draining and then you haven't even been. Also trying to think of what you could possibly say in some kind of situation is simply exhausting. 

Then you're at the party and are either lost or trying to function in a social way and it doesn't seem to work out.

If I can't get out of a party, I try to play happy happy for an hour until I can hopefully leave. It is very tiring.

Yes.  I'm the only person at work who isn't going to the Christmas get-together - which is actually an 'Escape Room' game.  Sounds too much like teamwork to me - which I've never been good at.

Yes! Me!