Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi,
I am currently really struggling at work. I have a high pressured job and and am considered good at it by my organisation and outside, however I am going under with the amount of stress. I feel like I am juggling so much responsibility that I am doing nothing right and failing everyone.
After receiving an email yesterday from a colleague attacking me personally as well as professionally I woke up in the night with panic attacks.
My difficulty is I cannot communicate this to anyone. My social anxiety means I just shut down.
I am nauseous and fighting back tears most mornings.
I cannot take time off or not work.
I think I need autistic specific support but don't know where to get it.
Any ideas?
I am sure some time away from work will help you. I injured my ankle recently and have had to spend a few days at home. It's amazing how much more clearly I can think about work related issues now the pressure is off. Very best wishes to you.
Thank you so much for all your advice. I will try and consider those suggestions one step at a time. I hope you are ok after leaving work.
I have to write the steps down and work through them. I have got some days off coming up in a few weeks so I will take some time to make a plan.
Thank you again.
Thank you so much. There is a lot to think about there and I will try and do one step at a time.
Again, thank you for all your help.
It sounds like a workplace assessment could help you, if your employer would be willing to pay for it - you can find more information about them at this link:
https://www.autism.org.uk/professionals/training-consultancy/employment/assessments.aspx
Alternatively, Access to Work should be able to assist you, or you could ask for an Occupational Health assessment (though they may not be too good at understanding autism).
Is your employer aware of your difficulties? Have you asked for reasonable adjustments? With regards to the upsetting email I would be inclined to forward it to your manager/HR and explain how it has made you feel - nobody should have to suffer such communications in work. I find it easier to communicate work difficulties in emails or letters, as it takes away a lot of my anxiety regarding communication.
It sounds as though things are particularly difficult for you at the moment. I totally understand the motivation to stay in work, but don’t push yourself too far. Think about taking some leave or ask if working from home for a while would be possible just to give yourself a break, if you don’t want to take time off sick or leave. You could also see your GP for some help regarding managing your anxiety and to see if there are any services they could refer you to that would support you in your work difficulties.
Best wishes to you with this and I hope you are coping better soon. I’ve been through terrible struggles in work myself and I know just how hard it can be to cope day-to-day even when you love your job and are good at it. I’ve literally just had to resign from another job because of mental health problems...
Hi there,
Have you tried phoning the NAS support line? I am sure they will have some good suggestions regarding autism specific support. ACAS is often mentioned as a helpful organisation for employment related issues. I would hope that they have advisers who understand autism.
From what you say it would be very difficult for you to step away from the pressure and give yourself a bit of time and space. Is there any way you can relieve some of the pressure while remaining at work? I am thinking of things like taking proper breaks. Making sure you eat well. Trying to do things that are calming and de-stressing before and after work. Do you have any annual leave you can take? Sometimes even a day to yourself with no demands can make a big difference.
Your organisation might have a wellbeing at work policy - it's worth having a look at this. My GP has a new service where you can email a doctor and get a reply the next day. if you don't feel able to speak to your GP I wonder if this is an option? The email attacking you sounds really unprofessional - it may well constitute bullying. I found the Tim Field Foundation's website incredibly helpful: www.bullyonline.org
Although Human Resources can be helpful it is important to remember they generally act for the employer so may not always have your best interests in mind. As autistic people I think we face particular challenges dealing with both stress at work and bullying. Conscientiousness sometimes makes us work too hard and neglect our health. Our essential honesty and niceness makes it difficult when we come up against dishonest, nasty people. I also think we get picked on not only because we are perceived to be different, but because we are awesome.
Wish I could help more. Not sure any of this is useful but I could not just stand by when I read your message. Do hope you get the support you need. I am sure others here who are not newbies like me will have lots of good ideas too.