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fed up 24/7

SamMorrell1990
over 5 years ago

hi

im new to this site but saw it and thought id cast my story. so when i was younger, i was told that i was growing up with autism but they said mine, unlike many, is just a rare form but growing up, it affected my life and each day, this still happens. friends say it's just a bad day but if they were in my shoes, they would realize how depressing living my life was. things that happen are people letting me down in the last minute everytime because they can't tell me the proper truth, people saying the wrong things and claiming they're "trying to help" and arguments with people claiming they're always right blah blah (not saying i am). the main topic that makes my life hell are the tiniest little things that can cause me severe anger. i admit, at times, i have thought about taking my own life or hurting myself. i dont know how much longer i can go on. 

anyone else felt like this and if so, how did you get through it. i'm trying to get counselling but its the wait for an appointment that's bothering me. i hate being kept waiting on many things in life. to pass the time, i usually turn to sitting by myself with music full blast, screen brightness on tv's, computers etc on max and refusing to sleep till really late at night (sometimes, all night)

any ideas to help (positive only) would be grately appreciated

Parents
  • over 5 years ago

    I’m fed up 24/7 to,I’ve been signed off work for a week,been given Mirtazapine I want it all to end too,I can’t get any help in North Dorset I’ve all’s have disassociation which is an out of body experience very strange feeling,everybody’s blank to me.I try to join in conversation at work but everyone blocks me out so I don’t bother.I never want to go back to work again I want to be on my own all the time,no one would miss me.I tried cutting myself to get attention but GP’s don’t care.

  • over 5 years ago in reply to NAS39067

    Very sorry to hear that. I never came as far as to cutting myself but I had other very dangerous and self-destructive behaviours like, for example, excessive drinking. What always saved me was creativity but at the very bottom of my anxiety, there's no energy for that either. I try to catch the first little spark of energy and be creative, also, clean up my flat, get rid of things I can get rid of... try to reload some old contacts (those that actually mattered). This is how, eventually, I escape depression.

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  • over 5 years ago in reply to NAS39067

    Very sorry to hear that. I never came as far as to cutting myself but I had other very dangerous and self-destructive behaviours like, for example, excessive drinking. What always saved me was creativity but at the very bottom of my anxiety, there's no energy for that either. I try to catch the first little spark of energy and be creative, also, clean up my flat, get rid of things I can get rid of... try to reload some old contacts (those that actually mattered). This is how, eventually, I escape depression.

Children
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