Published on 12, July, 2020
I can't stand stereotypes and do not wish to be defined by my condition. I would rather people saw me as an individual with strengths and weaknesses, some of which can be explained by me having Asperger's syndrome, rather than defining me by a label. This is why I can't stand the word 'aspie'. While having Aspergers is an important part of my identity, it is no more important than me being female, no more important than my sexuality or my age. I would hate it if someone did not see past me being a woman or past my age, why is having aspergers any different? The disability movement campaigned for disability to be seen not as an individual affliction or difference, to move beyond individualising disability and to see it as a societal problem: people with disabilities should campaign collectively to change society, making it imperative to see the person before the disability. I am a person with asperger's syndrome, not an aspie. I share traits that other people with AS may have, but I don't share all the traits, just enough to have aspergers. We are all different, to say I am an aspie suggests conformity with other 'aspies' and obliterates the part of me that defies easy categorization.
The term 'spectrum' is used to show that there are all different kinds of autism. The autistic spectrum. Really though surely we should all be on the humanity spectrum. I never define myself as an aspie and generally it is kept secret. My employer knows. He actually thinks I am quite an extreme example whereas I would say that I integrate very well with regular society, though at arm's length.
Nowadays people with the syndrome are beginning to become dominant in many of the modern industries and hence are entering the public consciousness. To this extent they are becoming typical, although not neurotypical, people. They cannot be segregated from society by a designation, they are part of society.
Huge numbers of 'NT' people demonstrate 'AS' tendencies and vice versa. We are not on an autistic spectrum, we are on a human spectrum. I find it hard to believe that anyone feels completely normal inside. Surely even accountants with 2.4 children and pensions must feel as though they are a bit strange. After all everyone else does.
Although I do try to keep it all on the hush hush I do appreciate the fact that there is a blanket term that I can offer people that will enable them to say 'Ah, of course, I should have known' when I am having noticeable difficulties with fitting in. To that extent it does help to take a little of the pressure out of the situation.