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I've just lost my best friend

Angel Cake

I've just received a message from who I thought was my best friend of over a year saying that, although she thinks I'm 'kind' and 'always want to do my best for everyone' I'm also 'too emotional' and 'downright annoying' (these are all direct quotes) and she never wants to speak to me again; she's asked me to not to contact her. This has come out of the blue; I swear I have done absolutely nothing...or at least I don't think I have. She didn't say I'd done anything, just that she 'doesn't like my personality' and she hopes I'll 'cherish the memories of our friendship, even though she doesn't want to be friends anymore'.

This has sent me into a spiral of despair, but I know she has every right to end the friendship if she's not happy. Am I overreacting? How will I get over this? Am I going to fail every friendship I'm in for the rest of my life? It's devastating, and all the worse for having been given no right of reply and no clear explanation, apart from the fact that 'she needs to concentrate on herself and I'm too emotional'. Which I suppose is fair enough...do I have a right to be upset?

Parents

  • This is an awful situation for you and I am so sorry that you have lost someone you deeply care for.

    Please be kind to yourself during this difficult time as it is all too easy to analyse everything that has happened to see how you could have fixed things.  It's not your fault and as cheesy as it sounds, time is a great healer, so whether your friend decides to contact you again or not, you will feel better able to cope with whatever happens.

    From having experience of similar situations, I haven't always got the answers I craved to understand what went wrong, but I have learned to accept them and move on and you will do the same with time.  Respect your friend's wishes and give your friend the space they need.  Focus on your needs now and seek support should you need it here on the forums or from other networks available to you.

    Take care.

Reply

  • This is an awful situation for you and I am so sorry that you have lost someone you deeply care for.

    Please be kind to yourself during this difficult time as it is all too easy to analyse everything that has happened to see how you could have fixed things.  It's not your fault and as cheesy as it sounds, time is a great healer, so whether your friend decides to contact you again or not, you will feel better able to cope with whatever happens.

    From having experience of similar situations, I haven't always got the answers I craved to understand what went wrong, but I have learned to accept them and move on and you will do the same with time.  Respect your friend's wishes and give your friend the space they need.  Focus on your needs now and seek support should you need it here on the forums or from other networks available to you.

    Take care.

Children
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