Anyone else have tidying issues?

I have actually googled and found this I'm exsreamly worried about my 17 yr old he can't stand anyone in his space so I respect that BUT have to clean his room as it's NOT just teenage dirt mess laziness etc it's much much worse !! But he just can't seem do it himself he does other things to help me not particularly lazy but his room got sooo bad it worries me as he says he wants move out in coouple yrs. He just can't seem or care about being a bit clean ! I don't expect polish and dusting just picking up rubbish every so often and taking out dirty plates on a regular basis or even Let Me doit  !! Bedding was so bad I had throw it away don't know what to do

Hiya Jorgie here(aka Gorgia,but cant change on my profile it seems)Me too,unfortunatly my un tidyness has become bit of an issue with my 12 year old(probably as she lives with her neat freak dad!)

So that has ment she has not being staying with me at weekends for a few months now,fortunatly we have finally come to a compramise,as I have said I will try and keep kitchen tidy(is always clean though)as apparently she needs plenty of space,just in case she wants to do some cooking,also she sugested moveing some stuff(which I didnt think of,and hate to say,did kind of make sense.)

Am now glad to say,she has now said she wants to stay with me from weekend after next,and Xmas eve too :-).

Yes i have tidying issues too, and gardening! (any housework really) i will tend to ignore or avoid housework for weeks, washing stuff as i need it etc, then suddenly ill get home from work one day and be overwhelmed with the mess and clutter and have a meltdown. Usually followed by a day of frantic cleaning, and then the cycle continues all over again

beck1234

beck1234

Your first paragraph is me to an absolute t. I try and reward myself by scheduling my tidying before a program I really want to watch. Sometimes works. Sometimes doesn't. Such a bad procrastinator.

I generally try and make Sundays my main tidying day. This works to an extent but I find if I end up having something planned on a Sunday any kind of tidying goes to pot. Same goes if I've had a bad week. The effort involved is just too much. I'm also trying to be really strict that I do dishes as soon as they've been used so that I don't end up with a pile of them, making it more difficult. It's a bit hit and miss at the moment. I find if there is one time I break the routine then it's really hard to get it back.

I'm so glad that you have commented this because I have thought about resorting to paper plates so many times. Never actually done it though. I'm interested that Ritalin improved your home. I definitely tick boxes for adhd but whether enough for a diagnosis I have no idea.

I'm the complete opposite house has to be spotless I'll have a meltdown if a dish has been left in sink or spec of dust on skirting boards etc

Love your reply JessicaJ ; you found a solution even if not ideal. Yes I see adhd and executive function issues here. I haven’t been brave enough to try Ritalin though. For you messy people ( me included) there is lots of adhd advice on this topic ( and others which overlap with asd) also on podcasts. I agree, messy, untidy, is one thing unclean and dirty is another.  It’s only becomes an problem if it adversely affects you  or the people you live with or becomes a hazard. There are other aspects too in that I really feel uncomfortable in somewhere pristinely clean and tidy and lacking “stuff” whereas others need things totally sparse or in order. It’s getting it to a level you think is ok for you. 

Does anyone else have this issue? And can anyone shed any light on why I find this so difficult or if there is anything I can do to make it easier?

ADHD would explain some of the issues with completing "chores". I amused the Hell out my psychiatrist by providing him with photo's of my home taken "before ritalin" and "after ritalin". 

I realise this may not be an entirely popular suggestion, largely on environmental grounds. I quite often buy paper plates and plastic cutlery. Not having to do so much washing up is worth it.

*runs away*

I'm not too bad with the sounds of mastication! It's people who have wrappers and bags. I put everything in bowls in my house. Crisps, sweets and stuff like that. Guests don't seem to mind. Going to the cinema is a pretty awful scenario when it comes to "wrapper wankers"!

Mine insisted on eating whilst watching a film.  She used to get annoyed with me because I insisted on eating first.  Then I'd sit next to her watching the film and all I could hear was the sounds of mastication!

Likewise when my ex was living with me.  She was horrendously untidy, and refused to do any household chores.  It's one of the reasons I now prefer living alone.

Mine used to bring food into the bedroom. Food doesn't belong in a bedroom! It caused a few rows.

I do think there's s difference between being messy and leaving a place filthy, to me filth is like you say Tom, not wiping up spills or leaving food out to grow germs/microbes.  Messy is just that,  I would describe my drawers as messy , and my desk may get messy. Tho I see my mess as "organised chaos" I know where to find things.  I love this quote from Albert Einstein" "If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign?".   www.inc.com/.../a-messy-desk-is-a-sign-of-genius-according-to-scie.html

Yes, I can relate to this, I have always been like this now I run a business from home I and continually lose important stuff, and everything is a mess, I have to rebuy things all the time as I cant find them, when something really annoys me I tidy for a few hours but never finish there is always a pile left on the floor that I intent "get back to later"

I'm the opposite.  I can't stand mess, and like to keep things tidy.  I'm not obsessive about it, as I was in my teens, but it's important to me to have clear floors and worktops, to clean regularly, and to generally keep things in order.  My desk drawers may be in a bit of a mess - but I know where everything is in them, and I can shut the drawers to hide it!

I work with several very untidy people who regularly leave our works kitchen in a mess - food out of the fridge, dirty plates stacked up, rubbish laying around, spilt milk and sugar unwiped, etc.  It drives me nuts.  Likewise when my ex was living with me.  She was horrendously untidy, and refused to do any household chores.  It's one of the reasons I now prefer living alone.

Thank you DC, yes my mess is organised mess, I know where it is no matter how deep it may be buried.

as CM said you really put a big smile on my face Lol.

wishing you much happiness and joy, mind the chemicals though, HAZCHEM suit?

I can't stop cleaning. It irritates me and consumes too much time. OCD is a ***.

Disambiguating Cynosure said:

There is a point-of-view, in that it is not a mess if it is an ORGANISED MESS. 

Lol, I share that point of view. I'm a tidy freak but I hoard things. They can end up in an ORGANISED MESS!

Disambiguating Cynosure said:

this is written from an Aspergers Chemist's point-of-view

I don't know if it's intentional but you really are making me laugh tonight!

If you find out a process or life cycle does it get burned into your brain? It does with me!

Storage of hazardous chemicals is always coming up in my parents house! The life of an Aspergers Chemist can be difficult!