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Giving up

midnightescape

Has anyone just felt like they're sick of trying so hard all the time? 

I just feel like this world is too difficult to navigate and I actually can't cope much longer. 

I have far too many problems to list them all here but I feel like my life is going to continue in this cycle because I'm not in the right environment and I don't get the right support. 

I was diagnosed at 22 so I've never had any support. I recently contacted the organisation that diagnosed me and two weeks later I'm still waiting for a response. I don't understand why even getting help needs to be so difficult. I feel like I'm on an emotional rollercoaster, there are too many things that affect my mood which I have no control over. 

A friend of mine committed suicide almost 18 months ago and I feel like the reason we were so close is because we were so similar and had similar issues. I miss her sooo much it hurts, I don't cry often but I do cry when I think about her. She suffered from anorexia and I am now being referred to some kind of specialist to see if I have an eating disorder. I just feel like it is all a bit too much and I'm not sure what to do next. 

Parents

  • I announced I was 'giving up' about ten years ago, before autism diagnosis, in an email to my friends and anyone who would expect anything from me. Not meaning killing myself, just admitting I'd failed after trying every avenue and attitude I could think of, not got anywhere I wanted, mental health services had failed (antidepressants were worse than useless), and I couldn't cope even with the quite minimal demands on me, like being in places I'd promised to be. Maybe it was a step towards putting myself first, or accepting things, because my mental health is probably better now than then.

    Some services only do diagnosis, and any autism-specific support is very thin to non-existent. 'Keep talking' sounds like good advice, to anyone who you can. A specialist dietician may be able to help with any eating disorder, in terms of feelings as well as practicalities. Do you know any of your dead friend's other friends? Could you maybe get together to do something to celebrate her life? Keep trying new stuff, as you never know what might help.

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  • I announced I was 'giving up' about ten years ago, before autism diagnosis, in an email to my friends and anyone who would expect anything from me. Not meaning killing myself, just admitting I'd failed after trying every avenue and attitude I could think of, not got anywhere I wanted, mental health services had failed (antidepressants were worse than useless), and I couldn't cope even with the quite minimal demands on me, like being in places I'd promised to be. Maybe it was a step towards putting myself first, or accepting things, because my mental health is probably better now than then.

    Some services only do diagnosis, and any autism-specific support is very thin to non-existent. 'Keep talking' sounds like good advice, to anyone who you can. A specialist dietician may be able to help with any eating disorder, in terms of feelings as well as practicalities. Do you know any of your dead friend's other friends? Could you maybe get together to do something to celebrate her life? Keep trying new stuff, as you never know what might help.

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